Somebody damaged my car in a parking lot and it might be my boss. What do I do?












112















Last week, somebody hit my parked car while I was at work and drove away without leaving a note. This did not happen on company property. (I work downtown, so parking is a public lot). I was really pissed off about it, and my insurance doesn't cover it. Police said they basically couldn't do anything about it.



Today, I saw another car in the lot that had a dent in the rear bumper and green paint around the dent. My car is green, and the location and damage of the dent was more or less consistent with where my car was hit. Figuring this was probably the person who hit my car, I waited in my car for him to show up. I didn't really know what I would do when he showed up, but I planned on yelling at him and showing how angry I was.



After 30 minutes, a woman hopped into the car. I was about to go up to her and give her a piece of my mind, but then I realized that she was my senior manager (my boss's boss). I froze in place not knowing what to do. As she drove away, she smiled and waved at me and I dumbly waved back.



I don't have enough evidence to conclusively prove that she was the one who hit my car, but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it was her. (Or at least her car). How the heck can I approach this situation? I really don't want to go up to her and accuse her of hitting my car. I was thinking about talking to HR or the police, but I have a feeling that she'll learn this was me that reported it, and this will come back to bite me somehow. Is it better to just eat the costs of this car damage to avoid awkwardness and uncomfortabless at work for the foreseeable future?










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  • 1





    I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

    – Tas
    2 hours ago











  • @Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago








  • 1





    Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

    – Tas
    1 hour ago













  • @Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago













  • ... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

    – mcalex
    1 hour ago


















112















Last week, somebody hit my parked car while I was at work and drove away without leaving a note. This did not happen on company property. (I work downtown, so parking is a public lot). I was really pissed off about it, and my insurance doesn't cover it. Police said they basically couldn't do anything about it.



Today, I saw another car in the lot that had a dent in the rear bumper and green paint around the dent. My car is green, and the location and damage of the dent was more or less consistent with where my car was hit. Figuring this was probably the person who hit my car, I waited in my car for him to show up. I didn't really know what I would do when he showed up, but I planned on yelling at him and showing how angry I was.



After 30 minutes, a woman hopped into the car. I was about to go up to her and give her a piece of my mind, but then I realized that she was my senior manager (my boss's boss). I froze in place not knowing what to do. As she drove away, she smiled and waved at me and I dumbly waved back.



I don't have enough evidence to conclusively prove that she was the one who hit my car, but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it was her. (Or at least her car). How the heck can I approach this situation? I really don't want to go up to her and accuse her of hitting my car. I was thinking about talking to HR or the police, but I have a feeling that she'll learn this was me that reported it, and this will come back to bite me somehow. Is it better to just eat the costs of this car damage to avoid awkwardness and uncomfortabless at work for the foreseeable future?










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  • 1





    I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

    – Tas
    2 hours ago











  • @Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago








  • 1





    Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

    – Tas
    1 hour ago













  • @Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago













  • ... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

    – mcalex
    1 hour ago
















112












112








112


6






Last week, somebody hit my parked car while I was at work and drove away without leaving a note. This did not happen on company property. (I work downtown, so parking is a public lot). I was really pissed off about it, and my insurance doesn't cover it. Police said they basically couldn't do anything about it.



Today, I saw another car in the lot that had a dent in the rear bumper and green paint around the dent. My car is green, and the location and damage of the dent was more or less consistent with where my car was hit. Figuring this was probably the person who hit my car, I waited in my car for him to show up. I didn't really know what I would do when he showed up, but I planned on yelling at him and showing how angry I was.



After 30 minutes, a woman hopped into the car. I was about to go up to her and give her a piece of my mind, but then I realized that she was my senior manager (my boss's boss). I froze in place not knowing what to do. As she drove away, she smiled and waved at me and I dumbly waved back.



I don't have enough evidence to conclusively prove that she was the one who hit my car, but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it was her. (Or at least her car). How the heck can I approach this situation? I really don't want to go up to her and accuse her of hitting my car. I was thinking about talking to HR or the police, but I have a feeling that she'll learn this was me that reported it, and this will come back to bite me somehow. Is it better to just eat the costs of this car damage to avoid awkwardness and uncomfortabless at work for the foreseeable future?










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Last week, somebody hit my parked car while I was at work and drove away without leaving a note. This did not happen on company property. (I work downtown, so parking is a public lot). I was really pissed off about it, and my insurance doesn't cover it. Police said they basically couldn't do anything about it.



Today, I saw another car in the lot that had a dent in the rear bumper and green paint around the dent. My car is green, and the location and damage of the dent was more or less consistent with where my car was hit. Figuring this was probably the person who hit my car, I waited in my car for him to show up. I didn't really know what I would do when he showed up, but I planned on yelling at him and showing how angry I was.



After 30 minutes, a woman hopped into the car. I was about to go up to her and give her a piece of my mind, but then I realized that she was my senior manager (my boss's boss). I froze in place not knowing what to do. As she drove away, she smiled and waved at me and I dumbly waved back.



I don't have enough evidence to conclusively prove that she was the one who hit my car, but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it was her. (Or at least her car). How the heck can I approach this situation? I really don't want to go up to her and accuse her of hitting my car. I was thinking about talking to HR or the police, but I have a feeling that she'll learn this was me that reported it, and this will come back to bite me somehow. Is it better to just eat the costs of this car damage to avoid awkwardness and uncomfortabless at work for the foreseeable future?







united-states manager






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edited 8 hours ago









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  • 1





    I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

    – Tas
    2 hours ago











  • @Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago








  • 1





    Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

    – Tas
    1 hour ago













  • @Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago













  • ... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

    – mcalex
    1 hour ago
















  • 1





    I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

    – Tas
    2 hours ago











  • @Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago








  • 1





    Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

    – Tas
    1 hour ago













  • @Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

    – scaaahu
    1 hour ago













  • ... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

    – mcalex
    1 hour ago










1




1





I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

– Tas
2 hours ago





I kinda feel like this should actually be closed as off-topic as it really has nothing to do with the workplace. I mean isn't the situation "something happened not at work, not on work premises and I have circumstantial evidence it was my boss / a colleague how should I react". No different to "I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore"

– Tas
2 hours ago













@Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

– scaaahu
1 hour ago







@Tas I saw someone rob a bank, and noticed my manager has the same jacket they wore In your example, the bank is not yours while in the OP's case, the car is his.

– scaaahu
1 hour ago






1




1





Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

– Tas
1 hour ago







Yes that's true, I should have chose a better example, although neither has anything to do with the workplace, regardless of whether it was my car or another car hit, or a bank robbed or my own house.

– Tas
1 hour ago















@Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

– scaaahu
1 hour ago







@Tas If it's your own house, there is difference. The key is that the OP lost value of his car or money if he chooses to repair the damage. The question is related to Workplace because the suspect is the OP's boss, not a stranger.

– scaaahu
1 hour ago















... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

– mcalex
1 hour ago







... but there's definitely circumstantial evidence to show that it's not impossible that it was her. FTFY

– mcalex
1 hour ago












13 Answers
13






active

oldest

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122














Other answers are correct in that you should not handle this via HR or your company. First of all, it's not your company's responsibility, and secondly, it didn't even happen on company property (it was on a public lot).



However, I do not agree with the other answers that you should keep your head down and suck up the costs.
Warning: Depending on your culture, if there is little to no worker protection from being fired by a vindictive manager, and you want to guarantee keeping your job, you need to evaluate whether you want to avoid getting unjustly fired at all costs, or whether you'd rather have your repair costs covered by the person who caused the damage. The rest of this answer assumes you want the latter.



Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all. Document the vehicle (take pictures of the dent/green paint/license plate) and go to your police station and ask them to look into it. Isn't that what you'd do if this car was driven by someone who is a complete stranger to you?



Whether they will do so and whether this will change the insurance company's response depends on your case and local culture. This is not something I can conclusively answer. I can imagine this turning out very differently, e.g. stereotypically comparing a metropolis (police are too busy) to a small town (police may have time to look into minor local matters).






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  • 5





    @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

    – Flater
    19 hours ago








  • 14





    @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

    – Flater
    19 hours ago








  • 1





    "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

    – David K
    15 hours ago








  • 1





    @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

    – Flater
    15 hours ago








  • 1





    @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

    – UKMonkey
    14 hours ago



















40














Ask her directly and politely.



First of all deal with your anger, your anger is your own problem.



Approach her and explain what happened. Don't accuse, just explain your car was damaged, which day, you don't kow who did it. Say that you noticed the dent in her car that is kinda matching yours and ask her if she thinks she could have accidentally done it without noticing. Make sure this conversation takes place near both cars in the parking so the evidence will be in front of your eyes.



Accept that her dent might be from another incident and someone else might have hit your car. As a matter of fact, once I was in a cinema parking lot and a guy asked me if I bumped into his car because I had a dent in mine, but my dent was from another incident, I was not guilty of this. Maybe it's even YOU who bumped into hers, without noticing because your music was too loud or something.



When you will ask in the parking she will either:




  1. She will aknowledge her responsibility. In that case, try to settle this friendly and without involving the police. She might offer that you deal with her insurance company, or she might only offer an apology, which is better than nothing and might give you peace. It's just a dent by the way, so it's only esthetic and it's normal that you be emotional, but you should let it go and accept that your car is not flawless anymore.


  2. She will deny damaging your car (truthfully or not). In that case you should believe that she is honest and move on, that is for the best. Show her that you believe her and that you don't resent her, you just wanted to respectfully ask. She will not hate you for asking. A dent is not a big deal anyway.



In all cases don't get into an interpersonal conflict with your boss's boss. And remember, deal with your own emotions, your anger is only for yourself and it's not useful to dump it on someone else.






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  • Yep. This is the best answer.

    – user85627
    15 hours ago











  • Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

    – Jannis
    14 hours ago








  • 1





    @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

    – Jannis
    12 hours ago






  • 2





    Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

    – ti7
    10 hours ago






  • 1





    @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

    – Matthew Read
    8 hours ago





















19














Just tank the costs of repairs. Unfortunate as it sounds.



Circumstantial evidence isn't strong enough to make an accusation and even if it were, the fact that this happened outside of work premises means that this would be better off discussed in private as opposed to involving HR.



HR have better things to do than worry about employees' cars getting hit in public lots, whether by another employee or not.






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  • 20





    While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

    – Flater
    20 hours ago











  • If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

    – pipe
    17 hours ago






  • 4





    @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

    – Flater
    17 hours ago











  • I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

    – Trevor D
    12 hours ago













  • @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

    – David Thornley
    11 hours ago



















14














On the insurance side, I would inform both my insurance and the police that I suspect the car that hit me is -insert boss's car description and number- and that I saw that car in the same park a few days later, still showing signs of damage that are consistent with the incident I reported. If they decide to take action on this or not is on them, not you. I would also seek legal council in case my insurance or the police refuses to act on provided information.



On the personal side, I would try to email the boss person telling them I was involved in an incident that resulted in damage to my personal property (with detailed description of where and when, and what my car looks like) and I suspect her car was involved based on damage I observed in the parking lot. I would also ask her if she knows anything about it. Do not threaten, do not provide more information than what is required for her to identify your vehicle and time/location of incident, do not require anything else other than asking if she knows anything about this.






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  • I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

    – Lightness Races in Orbit
    18 hours ago






  • 9





    For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

    – pytago
    16 hours ago






  • 2





    The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

    – Wesley Long
    13 hours ago



















12














Unless you had a witness who saw the collision or CCTV footage of it then there is nothing you can do.



The person who damaged your car did not leave a note and therefore has no intention of owning up to it so if you confront them they will deny it.



Even if you can prove that they did it you'd need to decide whether the cost of repairing the damage is worth more to you than the aftermath of calling out your boss on it.



I'd take this one on the chin and put it down to experience personally, the juice is probably not worth the squeeze.






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  • In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

    – gnasher729
    12 hours ago








  • 1





    @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

    – stannius
    9 hours ago



















5














Is it possible that the perp is unaware that they damaged their, and your property? It might not be the case, that it was an intentional hit-and-run.



If I were you, I would send an email to the entire company appealing for witnesses or information, including the time and precise location of the incident.



In the event that no information is offered, the extensively photographed damage on the suspect's car should be turned over to the cops for investigation.



Your property was damaged. You should be entitled to compensation, regardless of who caused the damage.






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    5














    Let's consider the path you didn't take.



    You have no earthly idea who owns the car that hit yours. So you snapped pictures of the car showing the damage and license plate, and took that to the cops, along with info of where the car tends to be parked. The cops decided how hot-n-heavy they wanted to get, and how exactly they wanted to take down this armed felon, if that's what he turned out to be.



    Parallel to that, you also took this information to your insurance company, so they could send their adjuster out there and try to catch that car, and/or identify the owner and liase with that car's insurance company. This would have gotten your car fixed, obviously.



    You did not choose that path, for reasons which are your own.



    The path you did choose



    Instead you chose to lay in wait, with an aim toward a confrontation. The problem with such things, is that they can go really sideways in a lot of unexpected ways. You know that, or reasonably should have known that.



    And lucky you, it did go sideways in one of the more comical ways it could go, torn right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie about the workplace. Instead of one of the horrible ways it could go.



    But as a result, your options are spent. Your actions had the effect of stalking your boss's boss, but not the intent and nothing more has come of this, so it can be dismissed as coincidence. You know the saying about odd misfortune:



    Once is happenstance
    Twice is coincidence
    Three times is enemy action


    This person is known to be cowardly, deceptive and manipulative. So if you press the matter further, she can be expected to try to disclaim the garage bump and use the weird garage encounter to twist your claim into an accusation against you.



    Even if you now go to the police/insurance, she could claim you intentionally hit her so you could fabricate the claim as part of your stalking.



    Have the courage to stick to your choice



    The fact is, you decided that day to sit in your car and settle the matter with a confrontation instead of going via police or insurance. And let's be clear here: the police and insurance both want you handling inter-driver disputes through them precisely because driving incidents are so very personal and emotional. There's a very long history of people being swept away by their rage into true stupidity. The whole point of their services is to stop you from doing exactly what you did, which is get all torqued up about it and seek confrontation.



    So you made your choice, confrontation instead of police/insurance. Now, you should sleep in the bed you made. You had your confrontation and it didn't go your way. Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you, doesn't make you a coward, just makes you a human. You have to swallow your pride and deal with it. That's part of picking fights, you lose about half the time.



    Yes, I know it can itch at your brain. It feels like a lack of closure. That's just wounded pride. Losing a square fight, then jinking around looking for ways to re-fight it, (aka holding a grudge), that's the act of a coward. You made your choice, stay with it.



    Matter settled.






    share|improve this answer


























    • I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

      – Criggie
      5 hours ago











    • @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

      – Harper
      4 hours ago



















    3














    Where I live in the US the police are overworked even in "good" neighborhoods.



    Call the police back with your case number.

    Tell them you have information about the car that you believe hit you.



    Give the police the description of the car, the license plate number, the fact that there was green paint on the (her) car, and that it is regularly parked in the same lot.

    Send them a photo of the damage to her car which includes the license plate if possible (you don't want to be seen doing this probably... so consider it optional).





    Optional:

    Send an email out to the company with a description of your car, the date it was hit, and that insurance won't pay for the repair. Ask people to call the police non-emergency phone number with the case# if they have any information.

    Keeps her from suspecting you if the police approach her about it.

    Also gives her a chance to come clean (maybe she didn't know, maybe she did but would be willing to come forward because it is you).





    Call the non-emergency number you were given regularly, to ask for updates.



    Let the police deal with revealing to your boss's boss that she might be the perp.






    share|improve this answer































      3














      Report her to the police. Use the dent as evidence. See if the police can get camera footage from nearby establishments that might be recording the parking lot.



      Her being your boss doesn't matter at all. She hit your car, and if you can prove it, she's going to pay damages. That's all their is to it.



      The chain of command is there to aid in getting things done. It's not there for you to cower in fear of losing your job every time someone above you does something. Fight back, the same way you'd fight back against anyone else.






      share|improve this answer































        2














        Not sure why "Yell at my boss's boss" and "eat the cost" is a strict dichotomy here. Why can't you be nice about it?




        Hey, Jane, the other day I noticed my car had been hit in a public lot. I happened to see your car and I noticed it had paint on it and a dent similar to the one that was on my car. Do you happen to know anything about what may have happened to my car?




        A reasonable person would own up to hitting your car in this case (if they did it) and work it out amicably with you. Especially since she's your boss's boss, I presume she probably has the money to cover it.



        Here's the other thing: If she doesn't come clean about it, that speaks a lot to her character as a manager. Managers need to be honest with their subordinates, about things like performance reviews, salary increases/decreases, projects and tasks, personnel changes, and so on. If she's not honest with you now, what makes you think she'll be honest with you at performance review time? It's unlikely you can get her fired (or even disciplined) over this as it's really not a work matter, but if you truly believe it was her but she won't own up to it, I'd look for a transfer out of her chain of command ASAP.






        share|improve this answer


























        • In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

          – Trevor D
          11 hours ago






        • 2





          If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

          – David Thornley
          11 hours ago



















        1














        Automotive paint is actually a highly distinctive blend of resin, solvent and pigment. Police will be able to collect a sample of that evidence and verify that paint on each car's bumpers matches the unique qualities of pain on the other car. This paint transfer is direct evidence, not circumstantial evidence. If you take the car to an auto paint shop and show an interest in what they do, someone will be glad to explain the myriad details involved in determining a paint match.



        However with that informative bit said, do not start a criminal investigation into a work superior unless you were already planning on leaving. Once the police are involved, you can't un-ring that bell. People's pride and fears can make situations like this messy. Paint transfer may be proof of the crime, but your being fired as retribution is nearly impossible to prove.



        You might be able to approach this as a private conversation with her, but consider this: If your hunch is right then you know she's irresponsible and unethical enough to commit crimes. And if your hunch is wrong you've effectively accused an innocent person of committing crimes. It's one of those gray cases where the right thing to do isn't necessarily the best thing to do. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely fix it and forget it.






        share|improve this answer








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        • I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

          – George M
          4 hours ago



















        0














        IANAL, but I have some experience with this kind of situations.



        On the side of damage coverage: Depending on your jurisdiction, the way to go with car incidents happening in lots is to document the damage and file a complaint to the owners/caretakers of the lot. Especially if it's a ticketed lot, it is their responsibility to cover the damages, as from the very moment you pay, this constitutes a binding agreement that they are taking care of your vehicle, so any damages not directly your fault (e.g. you scratching your car against a column would not qualify, but a random stranger scratching it with their keys or car would) should be covered by them. The problem here is that you did not document/file the complaint the moment it happened and instead drove away, only to get back later. You can still fill the complaint, but any hopes of getting your damage covered will entail an investigation on their behalf, probably involving surveillance footage revision so they can check that on the day of the events, your car entered the lot without the particular piece of damage.



        On the bright side, such investigation may prove your boss to be the culprit (although I am unsure as to what access you may have to the recordings); but, if this is the case, it does not matter as per the explained above: in the case of a parking lot, damages shall be covered by the caretakers, not the actual authors (if any) of the damages; so I would not address the situation with your boss in any case. Of course you can argue that she could have told you and then make ends meet with the parking caretakers, but that's beyond the point as far as workpplace relationships go.






        share|improve this answer



















        • 3





          I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

          – Laconic Droid
          11 hours ago











        • @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

          – the dark wanderer
          4 hours ago



















        0














        To be honest, I somewhat disagree with others recommending absolutely avoiding the HR. It depends on your course of action. I would approach that person first and ask if it was her perhaps and maybe an amicable solution can be achieved.



        If she denies responsibility, then file a police report and give them facts, i.e. that you thought it was your boss, however she denies responsibility, so you do not really know - this may point them to her direction. In that case I would also mention your course of action to your boss to prepare her that someone may ask her about it. This is obviously very thin ice, but I would mention it was necessary to file report to the police e.g. for better possibility of getting something from the insurance and you did have to state all the facts.



        If, in fact, it gets confirmed that it was your boss who damaged your car, now it does become a workplace issue and you should talk to the HR. You may have an open, potentially legal conflict with someone in your line of management, so the HR might consider taking action to stop it being a workplace issue, e.g. proposing to reassign either of you so that the company is not in this sticky position. There are typically HR policies forbidding fraternising / love relationships between managers and direct reports to avoid protectionism, but I guess the only reason they do not mention relationships based on personal/non-workplace hatred is that it would be somehow weird, but it is pretty much the same thing and it should be avoided.






        share|improve this answer























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          13 Answers
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          13 Answers
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          122














          Other answers are correct in that you should not handle this via HR or your company. First of all, it's not your company's responsibility, and secondly, it didn't even happen on company property (it was on a public lot).



          However, I do not agree with the other answers that you should keep your head down and suck up the costs.
          Warning: Depending on your culture, if there is little to no worker protection from being fired by a vindictive manager, and you want to guarantee keeping your job, you need to evaluate whether you want to avoid getting unjustly fired at all costs, or whether you'd rather have your repair costs covered by the person who caused the damage. The rest of this answer assumes you want the latter.



          Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all. Document the vehicle (take pictures of the dent/green paint/license plate) and go to your police station and ask them to look into it. Isn't that what you'd do if this car was driven by someone who is a complete stranger to you?



          Whether they will do so and whether this will change the insurance company's response depends on your case and local culture. This is not something I can conclusively answer. I can imagine this turning out very differently, e.g. stereotypically comparing a metropolis (police are too busy) to a small town (police may have time to look into minor local matters).






          share|improve this answer





















          • 5





            @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 14





            @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 1





            "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

            – David K
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

            – Flater
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

            – UKMonkey
            14 hours ago
















          122














          Other answers are correct in that you should not handle this via HR or your company. First of all, it's not your company's responsibility, and secondly, it didn't even happen on company property (it was on a public lot).



          However, I do not agree with the other answers that you should keep your head down and suck up the costs.
          Warning: Depending on your culture, if there is little to no worker protection from being fired by a vindictive manager, and you want to guarantee keeping your job, you need to evaluate whether you want to avoid getting unjustly fired at all costs, or whether you'd rather have your repair costs covered by the person who caused the damage. The rest of this answer assumes you want the latter.



          Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all. Document the vehicle (take pictures of the dent/green paint/license plate) and go to your police station and ask them to look into it. Isn't that what you'd do if this car was driven by someone who is a complete stranger to you?



          Whether they will do so and whether this will change the insurance company's response depends on your case and local culture. This is not something I can conclusively answer. I can imagine this turning out very differently, e.g. stereotypically comparing a metropolis (police are too busy) to a small town (police may have time to look into minor local matters).






          share|improve this answer





















          • 5





            @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 14





            @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 1





            "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

            – David K
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

            – Flater
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

            – UKMonkey
            14 hours ago














          122












          122








          122







          Other answers are correct in that you should not handle this via HR or your company. First of all, it's not your company's responsibility, and secondly, it didn't even happen on company property (it was on a public lot).



          However, I do not agree with the other answers that you should keep your head down and suck up the costs.
          Warning: Depending on your culture, if there is little to no worker protection from being fired by a vindictive manager, and you want to guarantee keeping your job, you need to evaluate whether you want to avoid getting unjustly fired at all costs, or whether you'd rather have your repair costs covered by the person who caused the damage. The rest of this answer assumes you want the latter.



          Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all. Document the vehicle (take pictures of the dent/green paint/license plate) and go to your police station and ask them to look into it. Isn't that what you'd do if this car was driven by someone who is a complete stranger to you?



          Whether they will do so and whether this will change the insurance company's response depends on your case and local culture. This is not something I can conclusively answer. I can imagine this turning out very differently, e.g. stereotypically comparing a metropolis (police are too busy) to a small town (police may have time to look into minor local matters).






          share|improve this answer















          Other answers are correct in that you should not handle this via HR or your company. First of all, it's not your company's responsibility, and secondly, it didn't even happen on company property (it was on a public lot).



          However, I do not agree with the other answers that you should keep your head down and suck up the costs.
          Warning: Depending on your culture, if there is little to no worker protection from being fired by a vindictive manager, and you want to guarantee keeping your job, you need to evaluate whether you want to avoid getting unjustly fired at all costs, or whether you'd rather have your repair costs covered by the person who caused the damage. The rest of this answer assumes you want the latter.



          Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all. Document the vehicle (take pictures of the dent/green paint/license plate) and go to your police station and ask them to look into it. Isn't that what you'd do if this car was driven by someone who is a complete stranger to you?



          Whether they will do so and whether this will change the insurance company's response depends on your case and local culture. This is not something I can conclusively answer. I can imagine this turning out very differently, e.g. stereotypically comparing a metropolis (police are too busy) to a small town (police may have time to look into minor local matters).







          share|improve this answer














          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer








          edited 11 hours ago









          Kat

          2,77221318




          2,77221318










          answered 20 hours ago









          FlaterFlater

          2,6531915




          2,6531915








          • 5





            @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 14





            @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 1





            "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

            – David K
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

            – Flater
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

            – UKMonkey
            14 hours ago














          • 5





            @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 14





            @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

            – Flater
            19 hours ago








          • 1





            "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

            – David K
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

            – Flater
            15 hours ago








          • 1





            @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

            – UKMonkey
            14 hours ago








          5




          5





          @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

          – Flater
          19 hours ago







          @paul23: Be that as it may (and I agree - don't work in conditions you don't want to work in), not everyone is free to make a choice. There are plenty of people who can't risk losing paychecks, e.g. when they have a family depending on them. I can (and would) argue that you need to persevere for what's right; but that's not going to change the fact that not everyone can cope with sudden unemployment as well as other people.

          – Flater
          19 hours ago






          14




          14





          @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

          – Flater
          19 hours ago







          @paul23: Your comment makes sense but it's simply not applicable to everyone. Not every job type has ample openings. Especially in lower income jobs, employees tend to be easily interchangeable and amply available, so the odds of taking longer to find a new job increase. As a software developer, I am quite secure in my ability to find a job and thus can act more confidently, and I would act exactly like you. But I would not be as receptive to it if I would struggle to find a new job and cannot afford to be unemployed for an extended period. Financial safety is important.

          – Flater
          19 hours ago






          1




          1





          "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

          – David K
          15 hours ago







          "Simply address this like you would if you didn't know the person at all." - I'll disagree with this point slightly, considering that the OP intended to just get angry and yell at the other driver. When you know this is someone you work with, particularly a manager, you need to interact with them professionally and politely. That doesn't mean that you can't still confront them, but you need to do so in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you.

          – David K
          15 hours ago






          1




          1





          @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

          – Flater
          15 hours ago







          @DavidK: The issue there is the assertion that it's OK to yell at strangers. Based on that assumption, it is equally OK to yell at someone who randomly happens to be their boss (note: it isn't OK in either case, but that's my point). It's hypocritical to condone yelling at strangers and only suggesting to not do so if the stranger actually can influence your life. Instead, be polite regardless of who you're talking to.

          – Flater
          15 hours ago






          1




          1





          @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

          – UKMonkey
          14 hours ago





          @paul23 I disagree - life is short ... way too short.

          – UKMonkey
          14 hours ago













          40














          Ask her directly and politely.



          First of all deal with your anger, your anger is your own problem.



          Approach her and explain what happened. Don't accuse, just explain your car was damaged, which day, you don't kow who did it. Say that you noticed the dent in her car that is kinda matching yours and ask her if she thinks she could have accidentally done it without noticing. Make sure this conversation takes place near both cars in the parking so the evidence will be in front of your eyes.



          Accept that her dent might be from another incident and someone else might have hit your car. As a matter of fact, once I was in a cinema parking lot and a guy asked me if I bumped into his car because I had a dent in mine, but my dent was from another incident, I was not guilty of this. Maybe it's even YOU who bumped into hers, without noticing because your music was too loud or something.



          When you will ask in the parking she will either:




          1. She will aknowledge her responsibility. In that case, try to settle this friendly and without involving the police. She might offer that you deal with her insurance company, or she might only offer an apology, which is better than nothing and might give you peace. It's just a dent by the way, so it's only esthetic and it's normal that you be emotional, but you should let it go and accept that your car is not flawless anymore.


          2. She will deny damaging your car (truthfully or not). In that case you should believe that she is honest and move on, that is for the best. Show her that you believe her and that you don't resent her, you just wanted to respectfully ask. She will not hate you for asking. A dent is not a big deal anyway.



          In all cases don't get into an interpersonal conflict with your boss's boss. And remember, deal with your own emotions, your anger is only for yourself and it's not useful to dump it on someone else.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.





















          • Yep. This is the best answer.

            – user85627
            15 hours ago











          • Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

            – Jannis
            14 hours ago








          • 1





            @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

            – Jannis
            12 hours ago






          • 2





            Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

            – ti7
            10 hours ago






          • 1





            @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

            – Matthew Read
            8 hours ago


















          40














          Ask her directly and politely.



          First of all deal with your anger, your anger is your own problem.



          Approach her and explain what happened. Don't accuse, just explain your car was damaged, which day, you don't kow who did it. Say that you noticed the dent in her car that is kinda matching yours and ask her if she thinks she could have accidentally done it without noticing. Make sure this conversation takes place near both cars in the parking so the evidence will be in front of your eyes.



          Accept that her dent might be from another incident and someone else might have hit your car. As a matter of fact, once I was in a cinema parking lot and a guy asked me if I bumped into his car because I had a dent in mine, but my dent was from another incident, I was not guilty of this. Maybe it's even YOU who bumped into hers, without noticing because your music was too loud or something.



          When you will ask in the parking she will either:




          1. She will aknowledge her responsibility. In that case, try to settle this friendly and without involving the police. She might offer that you deal with her insurance company, or she might only offer an apology, which is better than nothing and might give you peace. It's just a dent by the way, so it's only esthetic and it's normal that you be emotional, but you should let it go and accept that your car is not flawless anymore.


          2. She will deny damaging your car (truthfully or not). In that case you should believe that she is honest and move on, that is for the best. Show her that you believe her and that you don't resent her, you just wanted to respectfully ask. She will not hate you for asking. A dent is not a big deal anyway.



          In all cases don't get into an interpersonal conflict with your boss's boss. And remember, deal with your own emotions, your anger is only for yourself and it's not useful to dump it on someone else.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.





















          • Yep. This is the best answer.

            – user85627
            15 hours ago











          • Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

            – Jannis
            14 hours ago








          • 1





            @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

            – Jannis
            12 hours ago






          • 2





            Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

            – ti7
            10 hours ago






          • 1





            @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

            – Matthew Read
            8 hours ago
















          40












          40








          40







          Ask her directly and politely.



          First of all deal with your anger, your anger is your own problem.



          Approach her and explain what happened. Don't accuse, just explain your car was damaged, which day, you don't kow who did it. Say that you noticed the dent in her car that is kinda matching yours and ask her if she thinks she could have accidentally done it without noticing. Make sure this conversation takes place near both cars in the parking so the evidence will be in front of your eyes.



          Accept that her dent might be from another incident and someone else might have hit your car. As a matter of fact, once I was in a cinema parking lot and a guy asked me if I bumped into his car because I had a dent in mine, but my dent was from another incident, I was not guilty of this. Maybe it's even YOU who bumped into hers, without noticing because your music was too loud or something.



          When you will ask in the parking she will either:




          1. She will aknowledge her responsibility. In that case, try to settle this friendly and without involving the police. She might offer that you deal with her insurance company, or she might only offer an apology, which is better than nothing and might give you peace. It's just a dent by the way, so it's only esthetic and it's normal that you be emotional, but you should let it go and accept that your car is not flawless anymore.


          2. She will deny damaging your car (truthfully or not). In that case you should believe that she is honest and move on, that is for the best. Show her that you believe her and that you don't resent her, you just wanted to respectfully ask. She will not hate you for asking. A dent is not a big deal anyway.



          In all cases don't get into an interpersonal conflict with your boss's boss. And remember, deal with your own emotions, your anger is only for yourself and it's not useful to dump it on someone else.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.










          Ask her directly and politely.



          First of all deal with your anger, your anger is your own problem.



          Approach her and explain what happened. Don't accuse, just explain your car was damaged, which day, you don't kow who did it. Say that you noticed the dent in her car that is kinda matching yours and ask her if she thinks she could have accidentally done it without noticing. Make sure this conversation takes place near both cars in the parking so the evidence will be in front of your eyes.



          Accept that her dent might be from another incident and someone else might have hit your car. As a matter of fact, once I was in a cinema parking lot and a guy asked me if I bumped into his car because I had a dent in mine, but my dent was from another incident, I was not guilty of this. Maybe it's even YOU who bumped into hers, without noticing because your music was too loud or something.



          When you will ask in the parking she will either:




          1. She will aknowledge her responsibility. In that case, try to settle this friendly and without involving the police. She might offer that you deal with her insurance company, or she might only offer an apology, which is better than nothing and might give you peace. It's just a dent by the way, so it's only esthetic and it's normal that you be emotional, but you should let it go and accept that your car is not flawless anymore.


          2. She will deny damaging your car (truthfully or not). In that case you should believe that she is honest and move on, that is for the best. Show her that you believe her and that you don't resent her, you just wanted to respectfully ask. She will not hate you for asking. A dent is not a big deal anyway.



          In all cases don't get into an interpersonal conflict with your boss's boss. And remember, deal with your own emotions, your anger is only for yourself and it's not useful to dump it on someone else.







          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.









          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer






          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.









          answered 15 hours ago









          ManukiManuki

          37115




          37115




          New contributor




          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.





          New contributor





          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.






          Manuki is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.













          • Yep. This is the best answer.

            – user85627
            15 hours ago











          • Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

            – Jannis
            14 hours ago








          • 1





            @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

            – Jannis
            12 hours ago






          • 2





            Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

            – ti7
            10 hours ago






          • 1





            @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

            – Matthew Read
            8 hours ago





















          • Yep. This is the best answer.

            – user85627
            15 hours ago











          • Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

            – Jannis
            14 hours ago








          • 1





            @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

            – Jannis
            12 hours ago






          • 2





            Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

            – ti7
            10 hours ago






          • 1





            @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

            – Matthew Read
            8 hours ago



















          Yep. This is the best answer.

          – user85627
          15 hours ago





          Yep. This is the best answer.

          – user85627
          15 hours ago













          Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

          – Jannis
          14 hours ago







          Maybe you enage the conversation with telling her how nice/decent /pretty that car is. Then you shift the little question how the flaw/bumper happened. From the reaction you might have a clue a) if she was it or it was sth else she bumped into. b) if she was going report it or she just haven't got the time to do so. Then you can engage her with the truth --------- Hope it helps

          – Jannis
          14 hours ago






          1




          1





          @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

          – Jannis
          12 hours ago





          @Manuki You say it. He has no proof. even if she tells him this was her, he will lose at court. This is just a possibility to find out the truth. (learned from the series 'the mentalist' / I'm so proud of myself XD) and it's worth a try. And when it comes to sneaky: it's from each persons point of view. i never talked of lying just asking her more or less directly, without telling the whole story (when done right you dont have to tell anything). In the end this is a probabilitty to pressure her if she has done it and tries to come off without responsibility. OP has to decide what he/shes doin

          – Jannis
          12 hours ago




          2




          2





          Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

          – ti7
          10 hours ago





          Someone two levels above seems unlikely to 1) not have money to cover their costs, 2) act in poor faith if they did indeed cause the damage. I suspect going to court is out of the question as it's a huge waste of everyone's time, money, and face. Honestly asking and accepting their answer as honest is probably best to clear both your minds.

          – ti7
          10 hours ago




          1




          1





          @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

          – Matthew Read
          8 hours ago







          @ti7 I wouldn't say that acting in poor faith has anything to do with your position at your employer. They've already potentially done a hit and run, so I would personally rely on that case as the best indicator that they may not react well. The worst case definitely far outweighs the minor benefit of the best case, IMO. I favor the other answers suggestion that they let it go, as unsatisfying as that is.

          – Matthew Read
          8 hours ago













          19














          Just tank the costs of repairs. Unfortunate as it sounds.



          Circumstantial evidence isn't strong enough to make an accusation and even if it were, the fact that this happened outside of work premises means that this would be better off discussed in private as opposed to involving HR.



          HR have better things to do than worry about employees' cars getting hit in public lots, whether by another employee or not.






          share|improve this answer



















          • 20





            While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

            – Flater
            20 hours ago











          • If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

            – pipe
            17 hours ago






          • 4





            @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

            – Flater
            17 hours ago











          • I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

            – Trevor D
            12 hours ago













          • @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

            – David Thornley
            11 hours ago
















          19














          Just tank the costs of repairs. Unfortunate as it sounds.



          Circumstantial evidence isn't strong enough to make an accusation and even if it were, the fact that this happened outside of work premises means that this would be better off discussed in private as opposed to involving HR.



          HR have better things to do than worry about employees' cars getting hit in public lots, whether by another employee or not.






          share|improve this answer



















          • 20





            While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

            – Flater
            20 hours ago











          • If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

            – pipe
            17 hours ago






          • 4





            @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

            – Flater
            17 hours ago











          • I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

            – Trevor D
            12 hours ago













          • @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

            – David Thornley
            11 hours ago














          19












          19








          19







          Just tank the costs of repairs. Unfortunate as it sounds.



          Circumstantial evidence isn't strong enough to make an accusation and even if it were, the fact that this happened outside of work premises means that this would be better off discussed in private as opposed to involving HR.



          HR have better things to do than worry about employees' cars getting hit in public lots, whether by another employee or not.






          share|improve this answer













          Just tank the costs of repairs. Unfortunate as it sounds.



          Circumstantial evidence isn't strong enough to make an accusation and even if it were, the fact that this happened outside of work premises means that this would be better off discussed in private as opposed to involving HR.



          HR have better things to do than worry about employees' cars getting hit in public lots, whether by another employee or not.







          share|improve this answer












          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer










          answered yesterday









          Noir AntaresNoir Antares

          1,161315




          1,161315








          • 20





            While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

            – Flater
            20 hours ago











          • If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

            – pipe
            17 hours ago






          • 4





            @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

            – Flater
            17 hours ago











          • I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

            – Trevor D
            12 hours ago













          • @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

            – David Thornley
            11 hours ago














          • 20





            While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

            – Flater
            20 hours ago











          • If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

            – pipe
            17 hours ago






          • 4





            @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

            – Flater
            17 hours ago











          • I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

            – Trevor D
            12 hours ago













          • @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

            – David Thornley
            11 hours ago








          20




          20





          While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

          – Flater
          20 hours ago





          While I agree this is not something that needs to be handled via HR or the company, the accident didn't happen on company property (it's a public lot). Can OP not simply document the vehicle (picture of the dent + green paint and license plate) and go to the police directly? How does being a manager give this person a free pass that would not be given to any random road user?

          – Flater
          20 hours ago













          If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

          – pipe
          17 hours ago





          If his boss hit him in the face in a local pub, I'm pretty sure it would be a case for the HR department. Just because something doesn't happen on company property doesn't mean it's not an issue for the company.

          – pipe
          17 hours ago




          4




          4





          @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

          – Flater
          17 hours ago





          @pipe: There's a difference. When you punched someone, you probably know who they were (a coworker) before you punched them. In a hit and run, either party may simply be unaware who the other person is (let alone where they work), which means that the issue did not originate from an interpersonal conflict between two company employees, and thus HR has no inherent vested interest in investigating an issue that is completely unrelated to the workspace. Also, in cases of physical violence, HR is not the main responder, the police are. What HR does is secondary.

          – Flater
          17 hours ago













          I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

          – Trevor D
          12 hours ago







          I disagree with this. You should always contact your insurance and get them to deal with it. You can always choose to buy back the claim afterwards if the cost for the repairs is low enough. Registering the claim also helps prevent the person claiming you backed into them.

          – Trevor D
          12 hours ago















          @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

          – David Thornley
          11 hours ago





          @TrevorD There are different types of insurance. Generally, you have to be insured for damage you cause, called liability insurance, but being insured against what happens to you is not required. If OP has liability insurance but not collision insurance, the insurance company will not get involved.

          – David Thornley
          11 hours ago











          14














          On the insurance side, I would inform both my insurance and the police that I suspect the car that hit me is -insert boss's car description and number- and that I saw that car in the same park a few days later, still showing signs of damage that are consistent with the incident I reported. If they decide to take action on this or not is on them, not you. I would also seek legal council in case my insurance or the police refuses to act on provided information.



          On the personal side, I would try to email the boss person telling them I was involved in an incident that resulted in damage to my personal property (with detailed description of where and when, and what my car looks like) and I suspect her car was involved based on damage I observed in the parking lot. I would also ask her if she knows anything about it. Do not threaten, do not provide more information than what is required for her to identify your vehicle and time/location of incident, do not require anything else other than asking if she knows anything about this.






          share|improve this answer


























          • I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

            – Lightness Races in Orbit
            18 hours ago






          • 9





            For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

            – pytago
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

            – Wesley Long
            13 hours ago
















          14














          On the insurance side, I would inform both my insurance and the police that I suspect the car that hit me is -insert boss's car description and number- and that I saw that car in the same park a few days later, still showing signs of damage that are consistent with the incident I reported. If they decide to take action on this or not is on them, not you. I would also seek legal council in case my insurance or the police refuses to act on provided information.



          On the personal side, I would try to email the boss person telling them I was involved in an incident that resulted in damage to my personal property (with detailed description of where and when, and what my car looks like) and I suspect her car was involved based on damage I observed in the parking lot. I would also ask her if she knows anything about it. Do not threaten, do not provide more information than what is required for her to identify your vehicle and time/location of incident, do not require anything else other than asking if she knows anything about this.






          share|improve this answer


























          • I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

            – Lightness Races in Orbit
            18 hours ago






          • 9





            For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

            – pytago
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

            – Wesley Long
            13 hours ago














          14












          14








          14







          On the insurance side, I would inform both my insurance and the police that I suspect the car that hit me is -insert boss's car description and number- and that I saw that car in the same park a few days later, still showing signs of damage that are consistent with the incident I reported. If they decide to take action on this or not is on them, not you. I would also seek legal council in case my insurance or the police refuses to act on provided information.



          On the personal side, I would try to email the boss person telling them I was involved in an incident that resulted in damage to my personal property (with detailed description of where and when, and what my car looks like) and I suspect her car was involved based on damage I observed in the parking lot. I would also ask her if she knows anything about it. Do not threaten, do not provide more information than what is required for her to identify your vehicle and time/location of incident, do not require anything else other than asking if she knows anything about this.






          share|improve this answer















          On the insurance side, I would inform both my insurance and the police that I suspect the car that hit me is -insert boss's car description and number- and that I saw that car in the same park a few days later, still showing signs of damage that are consistent with the incident I reported. If they decide to take action on this or not is on them, not you. I would also seek legal council in case my insurance or the police refuses to act on provided information.



          On the personal side, I would try to email the boss person telling them I was involved in an incident that resulted in damage to my personal property (with detailed description of where and when, and what my car looks like) and I suspect her car was involved based on damage I observed in the parking lot. I would also ask her if she knows anything about it. Do not threaten, do not provide more information than what is required for her to identify your vehicle and time/location of incident, do not require anything else other than asking if she knows anything about this.







          share|improve this answer














          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer








          edited 18 hours ago

























          answered 21 hours ago









          BoboDarphBoboDarph

          3,4991619




          3,4991619













          • I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

            – Lightness Races in Orbit
            18 hours ago






          • 9





            For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

            – pytago
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

            – Wesley Long
            13 hours ago



















          • I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

            – Lightness Races in Orbit
            18 hours ago






          • 9





            For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

            – pytago
            16 hours ago






          • 2





            The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

            – Wesley Long
            13 hours ago

















          I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

          – Lightness Races in Orbit
          18 hours ago





          I think this is the most balanced approach suggested so far. Nice one.

          – Lightness Races in Orbit
          18 hours ago




          9




          9





          For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

          – pytago
          16 hours ago





          For this to work, OP should document the evidence first, ie by photographing his boss' car with the license plate and colored dent visible. Otherwise the boss, if guilty, might just repair the damage after being informed, rendering your insurance side action useless.

          – pytago
          16 hours ago




          2




          2





          The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

          – Wesley Long
          13 hours ago





          The first paragraph is good advice, save for the last sentence. The second paragraph is the reason for my downvote. Horrible idea.

          – Wesley Long
          13 hours ago











          12














          Unless you had a witness who saw the collision or CCTV footage of it then there is nothing you can do.



          The person who damaged your car did not leave a note and therefore has no intention of owning up to it so if you confront them they will deny it.



          Even if you can prove that they did it you'd need to decide whether the cost of repairing the damage is worth more to you than the aftermath of calling out your boss on it.



          I'd take this one on the chin and put it down to experience personally, the juice is probably not worth the squeeze.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.





















          • In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

            – gnasher729
            12 hours ago








          • 1





            @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

            – stannius
            9 hours ago
















          12














          Unless you had a witness who saw the collision or CCTV footage of it then there is nothing you can do.



          The person who damaged your car did not leave a note and therefore has no intention of owning up to it so if you confront them they will deny it.



          Even if you can prove that they did it you'd need to decide whether the cost of repairing the damage is worth more to you than the aftermath of calling out your boss on it.



          I'd take this one on the chin and put it down to experience personally, the juice is probably not worth the squeeze.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.





















          • In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

            – gnasher729
            12 hours ago








          • 1





            @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

            – stannius
            9 hours ago














          12












          12








          12







          Unless you had a witness who saw the collision or CCTV footage of it then there is nothing you can do.



          The person who damaged your car did not leave a note and therefore has no intention of owning up to it so if you confront them they will deny it.



          Even if you can prove that they did it you'd need to decide whether the cost of repairing the damage is worth more to you than the aftermath of calling out your boss on it.



          I'd take this one on the chin and put it down to experience personally, the juice is probably not worth the squeeze.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.










          Unless you had a witness who saw the collision or CCTV footage of it then there is nothing you can do.



          The person who damaged your car did not leave a note and therefore has no intention of owning up to it so if you confront them they will deny it.



          Even if you can prove that they did it you'd need to decide whether the cost of repairing the damage is worth more to you than the aftermath of calling out your boss on it.



          I'd take this one on the chin and put it down to experience personally, the juice is probably not worth the squeeze.







          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.









          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer






          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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          answered 20 hours ago









          Old NickOld Nick

          2294




          2294




          New contributor




          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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          New contributor





          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
          Check out our Code of Conduct.






          Old Nick is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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          • In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

            – gnasher729
            12 hours ago








          • 1





            @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

            – stannius
            9 hours ago



















          • In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

            – gnasher729
            12 hours ago








          • 1





            @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

            – stannius
            9 hours ago

















          In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

          – gnasher729
          12 hours ago







          In Germany, causing an accident and not staying at the place of the accident, coming forward and giving your name etc. Is a crime. On top of that, threatening to fire someone to prevent them from reporting a crime is a serious crime (perverting the course of justice, that’s something where being a minister doesn’t protect you). And you won’t believe how quick HR will be on your side if otherwise they would be supporting a criminal.

          – gnasher729
          12 hours ago






          1




          1





          @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

          – stannius
          9 hours ago





          @gnasher729 hit and run is a crime in the US, too. The trick is proving it. And if you can't prove the crime happened, I'm not a lawyer in the US nor Germany, but it seems to me that it's not a crime to fire someone for making an unproven accusation.

          – stannius
          9 hours ago











          5














          Is it possible that the perp is unaware that they damaged their, and your property? It might not be the case, that it was an intentional hit-and-run.



          If I were you, I would send an email to the entire company appealing for witnesses or information, including the time and precise location of the incident.



          In the event that no information is offered, the extensively photographed damage on the suspect's car should be turned over to the cops for investigation.



          Your property was damaged. You should be entitled to compensation, regardless of who caused the damage.






          share|improve this answer








          New contributor




          Butthead is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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            5














            Is it possible that the perp is unaware that they damaged their, and your property? It might not be the case, that it was an intentional hit-and-run.



            If I were you, I would send an email to the entire company appealing for witnesses or information, including the time and precise location of the incident.



            In the event that no information is offered, the extensively photographed damage on the suspect's car should be turned over to the cops for investigation.



            Your property was damaged. You should be entitled to compensation, regardless of who caused the damage.






            share|improve this answer








            New contributor




            Butthead is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
            Check out our Code of Conduct.























              5












              5








              5







              Is it possible that the perp is unaware that they damaged their, and your property? It might not be the case, that it was an intentional hit-and-run.



              If I were you, I would send an email to the entire company appealing for witnesses or information, including the time and precise location of the incident.



              In the event that no information is offered, the extensively photographed damage on the suspect's car should be turned over to the cops for investigation.



              Your property was damaged. You should be entitled to compensation, regardless of who caused the damage.






              share|improve this answer








              New contributor




              Butthead is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
              Check out our Code of Conduct.










              Is it possible that the perp is unaware that they damaged their, and your property? It might not be the case, that it was an intentional hit-and-run.



              If I were you, I would send an email to the entire company appealing for witnesses or information, including the time and precise location of the incident.



              In the event that no information is offered, the extensively photographed damage on the suspect's car should be turned over to the cops for investigation.



              Your property was damaged. You should be entitled to compensation, regardless of who caused the damage.







              share|improve this answer








              New contributor




              Butthead is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
              Check out our Code of Conduct.









              share|improve this answer



              share|improve this answer






              New contributor




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              answered 18 hours ago









              ButtheadButthead

              791




              791




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              New contributor





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                  5














                  Let's consider the path you didn't take.



                  You have no earthly idea who owns the car that hit yours. So you snapped pictures of the car showing the damage and license plate, and took that to the cops, along with info of where the car tends to be parked. The cops decided how hot-n-heavy they wanted to get, and how exactly they wanted to take down this armed felon, if that's what he turned out to be.



                  Parallel to that, you also took this information to your insurance company, so they could send their adjuster out there and try to catch that car, and/or identify the owner and liase with that car's insurance company. This would have gotten your car fixed, obviously.



                  You did not choose that path, for reasons which are your own.



                  The path you did choose



                  Instead you chose to lay in wait, with an aim toward a confrontation. The problem with such things, is that they can go really sideways in a lot of unexpected ways. You know that, or reasonably should have known that.



                  And lucky you, it did go sideways in one of the more comical ways it could go, torn right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie about the workplace. Instead of one of the horrible ways it could go.



                  But as a result, your options are spent. Your actions had the effect of stalking your boss's boss, but not the intent and nothing more has come of this, so it can be dismissed as coincidence. You know the saying about odd misfortune:



                  Once is happenstance
                  Twice is coincidence
                  Three times is enemy action


                  This person is known to be cowardly, deceptive and manipulative. So if you press the matter further, she can be expected to try to disclaim the garage bump and use the weird garage encounter to twist your claim into an accusation against you.



                  Even if you now go to the police/insurance, she could claim you intentionally hit her so you could fabricate the claim as part of your stalking.



                  Have the courage to stick to your choice



                  The fact is, you decided that day to sit in your car and settle the matter with a confrontation instead of going via police or insurance. And let's be clear here: the police and insurance both want you handling inter-driver disputes through them precisely because driving incidents are so very personal and emotional. There's a very long history of people being swept away by their rage into true stupidity. The whole point of their services is to stop you from doing exactly what you did, which is get all torqued up about it and seek confrontation.



                  So you made your choice, confrontation instead of police/insurance. Now, you should sleep in the bed you made. You had your confrontation and it didn't go your way. Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you, doesn't make you a coward, just makes you a human. You have to swallow your pride and deal with it. That's part of picking fights, you lose about half the time.



                  Yes, I know it can itch at your brain. It feels like a lack of closure. That's just wounded pride. Losing a square fight, then jinking around looking for ways to re-fight it, (aka holding a grudge), that's the act of a coward. You made your choice, stay with it.



                  Matter settled.






                  share|improve this answer


























                  • I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                    – Criggie
                    5 hours ago











                  • @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                    – Harper
                    4 hours ago
















                  5














                  Let's consider the path you didn't take.



                  You have no earthly idea who owns the car that hit yours. So you snapped pictures of the car showing the damage and license plate, and took that to the cops, along with info of where the car tends to be parked. The cops decided how hot-n-heavy they wanted to get, and how exactly they wanted to take down this armed felon, if that's what he turned out to be.



                  Parallel to that, you also took this information to your insurance company, so they could send their adjuster out there and try to catch that car, and/or identify the owner and liase with that car's insurance company. This would have gotten your car fixed, obviously.



                  You did not choose that path, for reasons which are your own.



                  The path you did choose



                  Instead you chose to lay in wait, with an aim toward a confrontation. The problem with such things, is that they can go really sideways in a lot of unexpected ways. You know that, or reasonably should have known that.



                  And lucky you, it did go sideways in one of the more comical ways it could go, torn right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie about the workplace. Instead of one of the horrible ways it could go.



                  But as a result, your options are spent. Your actions had the effect of stalking your boss's boss, but not the intent and nothing more has come of this, so it can be dismissed as coincidence. You know the saying about odd misfortune:



                  Once is happenstance
                  Twice is coincidence
                  Three times is enemy action


                  This person is known to be cowardly, deceptive and manipulative. So if you press the matter further, she can be expected to try to disclaim the garage bump and use the weird garage encounter to twist your claim into an accusation against you.



                  Even if you now go to the police/insurance, she could claim you intentionally hit her so you could fabricate the claim as part of your stalking.



                  Have the courage to stick to your choice



                  The fact is, you decided that day to sit in your car and settle the matter with a confrontation instead of going via police or insurance. And let's be clear here: the police and insurance both want you handling inter-driver disputes through them precisely because driving incidents are so very personal and emotional. There's a very long history of people being swept away by their rage into true stupidity. The whole point of their services is to stop you from doing exactly what you did, which is get all torqued up about it and seek confrontation.



                  So you made your choice, confrontation instead of police/insurance. Now, you should sleep in the bed you made. You had your confrontation and it didn't go your way. Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you, doesn't make you a coward, just makes you a human. You have to swallow your pride and deal with it. That's part of picking fights, you lose about half the time.



                  Yes, I know it can itch at your brain. It feels like a lack of closure. That's just wounded pride. Losing a square fight, then jinking around looking for ways to re-fight it, (aka holding a grudge), that's the act of a coward. You made your choice, stay with it.



                  Matter settled.






                  share|improve this answer


























                  • I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                    – Criggie
                    5 hours ago











                  • @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                    – Harper
                    4 hours ago














                  5












                  5








                  5







                  Let's consider the path you didn't take.



                  You have no earthly idea who owns the car that hit yours. So you snapped pictures of the car showing the damage and license plate, and took that to the cops, along with info of where the car tends to be parked. The cops decided how hot-n-heavy they wanted to get, and how exactly they wanted to take down this armed felon, if that's what he turned out to be.



                  Parallel to that, you also took this information to your insurance company, so they could send their adjuster out there and try to catch that car, and/or identify the owner and liase with that car's insurance company. This would have gotten your car fixed, obviously.



                  You did not choose that path, for reasons which are your own.



                  The path you did choose



                  Instead you chose to lay in wait, with an aim toward a confrontation. The problem with such things, is that they can go really sideways in a lot of unexpected ways. You know that, or reasonably should have known that.



                  And lucky you, it did go sideways in one of the more comical ways it could go, torn right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie about the workplace. Instead of one of the horrible ways it could go.



                  But as a result, your options are spent. Your actions had the effect of stalking your boss's boss, but not the intent and nothing more has come of this, so it can be dismissed as coincidence. You know the saying about odd misfortune:



                  Once is happenstance
                  Twice is coincidence
                  Three times is enemy action


                  This person is known to be cowardly, deceptive and manipulative. So if you press the matter further, she can be expected to try to disclaim the garage bump and use the weird garage encounter to twist your claim into an accusation against you.



                  Even if you now go to the police/insurance, she could claim you intentionally hit her so you could fabricate the claim as part of your stalking.



                  Have the courage to stick to your choice



                  The fact is, you decided that day to sit in your car and settle the matter with a confrontation instead of going via police or insurance. And let's be clear here: the police and insurance both want you handling inter-driver disputes through them precisely because driving incidents are so very personal and emotional. There's a very long history of people being swept away by their rage into true stupidity. The whole point of their services is to stop you from doing exactly what you did, which is get all torqued up about it and seek confrontation.



                  So you made your choice, confrontation instead of police/insurance. Now, you should sleep in the bed you made. You had your confrontation and it didn't go your way. Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you, doesn't make you a coward, just makes you a human. You have to swallow your pride and deal with it. That's part of picking fights, you lose about half the time.



                  Yes, I know it can itch at your brain. It feels like a lack of closure. That's just wounded pride. Losing a square fight, then jinking around looking for ways to re-fight it, (aka holding a grudge), that's the act of a coward. You made your choice, stay with it.



                  Matter settled.






                  share|improve this answer















                  Let's consider the path you didn't take.



                  You have no earthly idea who owns the car that hit yours. So you snapped pictures of the car showing the damage and license plate, and took that to the cops, along with info of where the car tends to be parked. The cops decided how hot-n-heavy they wanted to get, and how exactly they wanted to take down this armed felon, if that's what he turned out to be.



                  Parallel to that, you also took this information to your insurance company, so they could send their adjuster out there and try to catch that car, and/or identify the owner and liase with that car's insurance company. This would have gotten your car fixed, obviously.



                  You did not choose that path, for reasons which are your own.



                  The path you did choose



                  Instead you chose to lay in wait, with an aim toward a confrontation. The problem with such things, is that they can go really sideways in a lot of unexpected ways. You know that, or reasonably should have known that.



                  And lucky you, it did go sideways in one of the more comical ways it could go, torn right out of a Jennifer Aniston movie about the workplace. Instead of one of the horrible ways it could go.



                  But as a result, your options are spent. Your actions had the effect of stalking your boss's boss, but not the intent and nothing more has come of this, so it can be dismissed as coincidence. You know the saying about odd misfortune:



                  Once is happenstance
                  Twice is coincidence
                  Three times is enemy action


                  This person is known to be cowardly, deceptive and manipulative. So if you press the matter further, she can be expected to try to disclaim the garage bump and use the weird garage encounter to twist your claim into an accusation against you.



                  Even if you now go to the police/insurance, she could claim you intentionally hit her so you could fabricate the claim as part of your stalking.



                  Have the courage to stick to your choice



                  The fact is, you decided that day to sit in your car and settle the matter with a confrontation instead of going via police or insurance. And let's be clear here: the police and insurance both want you handling inter-driver disputes through them precisely because driving incidents are so very personal and emotional. There's a very long history of people being swept away by their rage into true stupidity. The whole point of their services is to stop you from doing exactly what you did, which is get all torqued up about it and seek confrontation.



                  So you made your choice, confrontation instead of police/insurance. Now, you should sleep in the bed you made. You had your confrontation and it didn't go your way. Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you, doesn't make you a coward, just makes you a human. You have to swallow your pride and deal with it. That's part of picking fights, you lose about half the time.



                  Yes, I know it can itch at your brain. It feels like a lack of closure. That's just wounded pride. Losing a square fight, then jinking around looking for ways to re-fight it, (aka holding a grudge), that's the act of a coward. You made your choice, stay with it.



                  Matter settled.







                  share|improve this answer














                  share|improve this answer



                  share|improve this answer








                  edited 4 hours ago

























                  answered 9 hours ago









                  HarperHarper

                  4,1791719




                  4,1791719













                  • I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                    – Criggie
                    5 hours ago











                  • @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                    – Harper
                    4 hours ago



















                  • I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                    – Criggie
                    5 hours ago











                  • @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                    – Harper
                    4 hours ago

















                  I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                  – Criggie
                  5 hours ago





                  I believe your direct quote is from Ian Fleming's book/movie Goldfinger and not related to the military, other than being inspired by his millitary experiences.

                  – Criggie
                  5 hours ago













                  @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                  – Harper
                  4 hours ago





                  @Criggie interesting, it seems to have gotten a life of its own, then. I have seen it several places, none Bond related.

                  – Harper
                  4 hours ago











                  3














                  Where I live in the US the police are overworked even in "good" neighborhoods.



                  Call the police back with your case number.

                  Tell them you have information about the car that you believe hit you.



                  Give the police the description of the car, the license plate number, the fact that there was green paint on the (her) car, and that it is regularly parked in the same lot.

                  Send them a photo of the damage to her car which includes the license plate if possible (you don't want to be seen doing this probably... so consider it optional).





                  Optional:

                  Send an email out to the company with a description of your car, the date it was hit, and that insurance won't pay for the repair. Ask people to call the police non-emergency phone number with the case# if they have any information.

                  Keeps her from suspecting you if the police approach her about it.

                  Also gives her a chance to come clean (maybe she didn't know, maybe she did but would be willing to come forward because it is you).





                  Call the non-emergency number you were given regularly, to ask for updates.



                  Let the police deal with revealing to your boss's boss that she might be the perp.






                  share|improve this answer




























                    3














                    Where I live in the US the police are overworked even in "good" neighborhoods.



                    Call the police back with your case number.

                    Tell them you have information about the car that you believe hit you.



                    Give the police the description of the car, the license plate number, the fact that there was green paint on the (her) car, and that it is regularly parked in the same lot.

                    Send them a photo of the damage to her car which includes the license plate if possible (you don't want to be seen doing this probably... so consider it optional).





                    Optional:

                    Send an email out to the company with a description of your car, the date it was hit, and that insurance won't pay for the repair. Ask people to call the police non-emergency phone number with the case# if they have any information.

                    Keeps her from suspecting you if the police approach her about it.

                    Also gives her a chance to come clean (maybe she didn't know, maybe she did but would be willing to come forward because it is you).





                    Call the non-emergency number you were given regularly, to ask for updates.



                    Let the police deal with revealing to your boss's boss that she might be the perp.






                    share|improve this answer


























                      3












                      3








                      3







                      Where I live in the US the police are overworked even in "good" neighborhoods.



                      Call the police back with your case number.

                      Tell them you have information about the car that you believe hit you.



                      Give the police the description of the car, the license plate number, the fact that there was green paint on the (her) car, and that it is regularly parked in the same lot.

                      Send them a photo of the damage to her car which includes the license plate if possible (you don't want to be seen doing this probably... so consider it optional).





                      Optional:

                      Send an email out to the company with a description of your car, the date it was hit, and that insurance won't pay for the repair. Ask people to call the police non-emergency phone number with the case# if they have any information.

                      Keeps her from suspecting you if the police approach her about it.

                      Also gives her a chance to come clean (maybe she didn't know, maybe she did but would be willing to come forward because it is you).





                      Call the non-emergency number you were given regularly, to ask for updates.



                      Let the police deal with revealing to your boss's boss that she might be the perp.






                      share|improve this answer













                      Where I live in the US the police are overworked even in "good" neighborhoods.



                      Call the police back with your case number.

                      Tell them you have information about the car that you believe hit you.



                      Give the police the description of the car, the license plate number, the fact that there was green paint on the (her) car, and that it is regularly parked in the same lot.

                      Send them a photo of the damage to her car which includes the license plate if possible (you don't want to be seen doing this probably... so consider it optional).





                      Optional:

                      Send an email out to the company with a description of your car, the date it was hit, and that insurance won't pay for the repair. Ask people to call the police non-emergency phone number with the case# if they have any information.

                      Keeps her from suspecting you if the police approach her about it.

                      Also gives her a chance to come clean (maybe she didn't know, maybe she did but would be willing to come forward because it is you).





                      Call the non-emergency number you were given regularly, to ask for updates.



                      Let the police deal with revealing to your boss's boss that she might be the perp.







                      share|improve this answer












                      share|improve this answer



                      share|improve this answer










                      answered 14 hours ago









                      J. Chris ComptonJ. Chris Compton

                      4,616629




                      4,616629























                          3














                          Report her to the police. Use the dent as evidence. See if the police can get camera footage from nearby establishments that might be recording the parking lot.



                          Her being your boss doesn't matter at all. She hit your car, and if you can prove it, she's going to pay damages. That's all their is to it.



                          The chain of command is there to aid in getting things done. It's not there for you to cower in fear of losing your job every time someone above you does something. Fight back, the same way you'd fight back against anyone else.






                          share|improve this answer




























                            3














                            Report her to the police. Use the dent as evidence. See if the police can get camera footage from nearby establishments that might be recording the parking lot.



                            Her being your boss doesn't matter at all. She hit your car, and if you can prove it, she's going to pay damages. That's all their is to it.



                            The chain of command is there to aid in getting things done. It's not there for you to cower in fear of losing your job every time someone above you does something. Fight back, the same way you'd fight back against anyone else.






                            share|improve this answer


























                              3












                              3








                              3







                              Report her to the police. Use the dent as evidence. See if the police can get camera footage from nearby establishments that might be recording the parking lot.



                              Her being your boss doesn't matter at all. She hit your car, and if you can prove it, she's going to pay damages. That's all their is to it.



                              The chain of command is there to aid in getting things done. It's not there for you to cower in fear of losing your job every time someone above you does something. Fight back, the same way you'd fight back against anyone else.






                              share|improve this answer













                              Report her to the police. Use the dent as evidence. See if the police can get camera footage from nearby establishments that might be recording the parking lot.



                              Her being your boss doesn't matter at all. She hit your car, and if you can prove it, she's going to pay damages. That's all their is to it.



                              The chain of command is there to aid in getting things done. It's not there for you to cower in fear of losing your job every time someone above you does something. Fight back, the same way you'd fight back against anyone else.







                              share|improve this answer












                              share|improve this answer



                              share|improve this answer










                              answered 13 hours ago









                              SteveSteve

                              2,719518




                              2,719518























                                  2














                                  Not sure why "Yell at my boss's boss" and "eat the cost" is a strict dichotomy here. Why can't you be nice about it?




                                  Hey, Jane, the other day I noticed my car had been hit in a public lot. I happened to see your car and I noticed it had paint on it and a dent similar to the one that was on my car. Do you happen to know anything about what may have happened to my car?




                                  A reasonable person would own up to hitting your car in this case (if they did it) and work it out amicably with you. Especially since she's your boss's boss, I presume she probably has the money to cover it.



                                  Here's the other thing: If she doesn't come clean about it, that speaks a lot to her character as a manager. Managers need to be honest with their subordinates, about things like performance reviews, salary increases/decreases, projects and tasks, personnel changes, and so on. If she's not honest with you now, what makes you think she'll be honest with you at performance review time? It's unlikely you can get her fired (or even disciplined) over this as it's really not a work matter, but if you truly believe it was her but she won't own up to it, I'd look for a transfer out of her chain of command ASAP.






                                  share|improve this answer


























                                  • In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                    – Trevor D
                                    11 hours ago






                                  • 2





                                    If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                    – David Thornley
                                    11 hours ago
















                                  2














                                  Not sure why "Yell at my boss's boss" and "eat the cost" is a strict dichotomy here. Why can't you be nice about it?




                                  Hey, Jane, the other day I noticed my car had been hit in a public lot. I happened to see your car and I noticed it had paint on it and a dent similar to the one that was on my car. Do you happen to know anything about what may have happened to my car?




                                  A reasonable person would own up to hitting your car in this case (if they did it) and work it out amicably with you. Especially since she's your boss's boss, I presume she probably has the money to cover it.



                                  Here's the other thing: If she doesn't come clean about it, that speaks a lot to her character as a manager. Managers need to be honest with their subordinates, about things like performance reviews, salary increases/decreases, projects and tasks, personnel changes, and so on. If she's not honest with you now, what makes you think she'll be honest with you at performance review time? It's unlikely you can get her fired (or even disciplined) over this as it's really not a work matter, but if you truly believe it was her but she won't own up to it, I'd look for a transfer out of her chain of command ASAP.






                                  share|improve this answer


























                                  • In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                    – Trevor D
                                    11 hours ago






                                  • 2





                                    If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                    – David Thornley
                                    11 hours ago














                                  2












                                  2








                                  2







                                  Not sure why "Yell at my boss's boss" and "eat the cost" is a strict dichotomy here. Why can't you be nice about it?




                                  Hey, Jane, the other day I noticed my car had been hit in a public lot. I happened to see your car and I noticed it had paint on it and a dent similar to the one that was on my car. Do you happen to know anything about what may have happened to my car?




                                  A reasonable person would own up to hitting your car in this case (if they did it) and work it out amicably with you. Especially since she's your boss's boss, I presume she probably has the money to cover it.



                                  Here's the other thing: If she doesn't come clean about it, that speaks a lot to her character as a manager. Managers need to be honest with their subordinates, about things like performance reviews, salary increases/decreases, projects and tasks, personnel changes, and so on. If she's not honest with you now, what makes you think she'll be honest with you at performance review time? It's unlikely you can get her fired (or even disciplined) over this as it's really not a work matter, but if you truly believe it was her but she won't own up to it, I'd look for a transfer out of her chain of command ASAP.






                                  share|improve this answer















                                  Not sure why "Yell at my boss's boss" and "eat the cost" is a strict dichotomy here. Why can't you be nice about it?




                                  Hey, Jane, the other day I noticed my car had been hit in a public lot. I happened to see your car and I noticed it had paint on it and a dent similar to the one that was on my car. Do you happen to know anything about what may have happened to my car?




                                  A reasonable person would own up to hitting your car in this case (if they did it) and work it out amicably with you. Especially since she's your boss's boss, I presume she probably has the money to cover it.



                                  Here's the other thing: If she doesn't come clean about it, that speaks a lot to her character as a manager. Managers need to be honest with their subordinates, about things like performance reviews, salary increases/decreases, projects and tasks, personnel changes, and so on. If she's not honest with you now, what makes you think she'll be honest with you at performance review time? It's unlikely you can get her fired (or even disciplined) over this as it's really not a work matter, but if you truly believe it was her but she won't own up to it, I'd look for a transfer out of her chain of command ASAP.







                                  share|improve this answer














                                  share|improve this answer



                                  share|improve this answer








                                  edited 11 hours ago

























                                  answered 13 hours ago









                                  Ertai87Ertai87

                                  7,9301824




                                  7,9301824













                                  • In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                    – Trevor D
                                    11 hours ago






                                  • 2





                                    If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                    – David Thornley
                                    11 hours ago



















                                  • In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                    – Trevor D
                                    11 hours ago






                                  • 2





                                    If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                    – David Thornley
                                    11 hours ago

















                                  In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                  – Trevor D
                                  11 hours ago





                                  In addition, it helps to follow up with extra info to put them at ease when they admit. You can remind them that they can buy back the claim from the insurance company and then the accident is like it never happened.

                                  – Trevor D
                                  11 hours ago




                                  2




                                  2





                                  If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                  – David Thornley
                                  11 hours ago





                                  If she doesn't admit to the damage, it could be because she didn't do it. The evidence is persuasive rather than convincing.

                                  – David Thornley
                                  11 hours ago











                                  1














                                  Automotive paint is actually a highly distinctive blend of resin, solvent and pigment. Police will be able to collect a sample of that evidence and verify that paint on each car's bumpers matches the unique qualities of pain on the other car. This paint transfer is direct evidence, not circumstantial evidence. If you take the car to an auto paint shop and show an interest in what they do, someone will be glad to explain the myriad details involved in determining a paint match.



                                  However with that informative bit said, do not start a criminal investigation into a work superior unless you were already planning on leaving. Once the police are involved, you can't un-ring that bell. People's pride and fears can make situations like this messy. Paint transfer may be proof of the crime, but your being fired as retribution is nearly impossible to prove.



                                  You might be able to approach this as a private conversation with her, but consider this: If your hunch is right then you know she's irresponsible and unethical enough to commit crimes. And if your hunch is wrong you've effectively accused an innocent person of committing crimes. It's one of those gray cases where the right thing to do isn't necessarily the best thing to do. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely fix it and forget it.






                                  share|improve this answer








                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.





















                                  • I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                    – George M
                                    4 hours ago
















                                  1














                                  Automotive paint is actually a highly distinctive blend of resin, solvent and pigment. Police will be able to collect a sample of that evidence and verify that paint on each car's bumpers matches the unique qualities of pain on the other car. This paint transfer is direct evidence, not circumstantial evidence. If you take the car to an auto paint shop and show an interest in what they do, someone will be glad to explain the myriad details involved in determining a paint match.



                                  However with that informative bit said, do not start a criminal investigation into a work superior unless you were already planning on leaving. Once the police are involved, you can't un-ring that bell. People's pride and fears can make situations like this messy. Paint transfer may be proof of the crime, but your being fired as retribution is nearly impossible to prove.



                                  You might be able to approach this as a private conversation with her, but consider this: If your hunch is right then you know she's irresponsible and unethical enough to commit crimes. And if your hunch is wrong you've effectively accused an innocent person of committing crimes. It's one of those gray cases where the right thing to do isn't necessarily the best thing to do. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely fix it and forget it.






                                  share|improve this answer








                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.





















                                  • I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                    – George M
                                    4 hours ago














                                  1












                                  1








                                  1







                                  Automotive paint is actually a highly distinctive blend of resin, solvent and pigment. Police will be able to collect a sample of that evidence and verify that paint on each car's bumpers matches the unique qualities of pain on the other car. This paint transfer is direct evidence, not circumstantial evidence. If you take the car to an auto paint shop and show an interest in what they do, someone will be glad to explain the myriad details involved in determining a paint match.



                                  However with that informative bit said, do not start a criminal investigation into a work superior unless you were already planning on leaving. Once the police are involved, you can't un-ring that bell. People's pride and fears can make situations like this messy. Paint transfer may be proof of the crime, but your being fired as retribution is nearly impossible to prove.



                                  You might be able to approach this as a private conversation with her, but consider this: If your hunch is right then you know she's irresponsible and unethical enough to commit crimes. And if your hunch is wrong you've effectively accused an innocent person of committing crimes. It's one of those gray cases where the right thing to do isn't necessarily the best thing to do. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely fix it and forget it.






                                  share|improve this answer








                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.










                                  Automotive paint is actually a highly distinctive blend of resin, solvent and pigment. Police will be able to collect a sample of that evidence and verify that paint on each car's bumpers matches the unique qualities of pain on the other car. This paint transfer is direct evidence, not circumstantial evidence. If you take the car to an auto paint shop and show an interest in what they do, someone will be glad to explain the myriad details involved in determining a paint match.



                                  However with that informative bit said, do not start a criminal investigation into a work superior unless you were already planning on leaving. Once the police are involved, you can't un-ring that bell. People's pride and fears can make situations like this messy. Paint transfer may be proof of the crime, but your being fired as retribution is nearly impossible to prove.



                                  You might be able to approach this as a private conversation with her, but consider this: If your hunch is right then you know she's irresponsible and unethical enough to commit crimes. And if your hunch is wrong you've effectively accused an innocent person of committing crimes. It's one of those gray cases where the right thing to do isn't necessarily the best thing to do. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely fix it and forget it.







                                  share|improve this answer








                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.









                                  share|improve this answer



                                  share|improve this answer






                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.









                                  answered 13 hours ago









                                  Some internet guySome internet guy

                                  191




                                  191




                                  New contributor




                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.





                                  New contributor





                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.






                                  Some internet guy is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                                  Check out our Code of Conduct.













                                  • I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                    – George M
                                    4 hours ago



















                                  • I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                    – George M
                                    4 hours ago

















                                  I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                  – George M
                                  4 hours ago





                                  I don't know where you live, but in my state the police would barely consider this if she had murdered you rather than just ding your car

                                  – George M
                                  4 hours ago











                                  0














                                  IANAL, but I have some experience with this kind of situations.



                                  On the side of damage coverage: Depending on your jurisdiction, the way to go with car incidents happening in lots is to document the damage and file a complaint to the owners/caretakers of the lot. Especially if it's a ticketed lot, it is their responsibility to cover the damages, as from the very moment you pay, this constitutes a binding agreement that they are taking care of your vehicle, so any damages not directly your fault (e.g. you scratching your car against a column would not qualify, but a random stranger scratching it with their keys or car would) should be covered by them. The problem here is that you did not document/file the complaint the moment it happened and instead drove away, only to get back later. You can still fill the complaint, but any hopes of getting your damage covered will entail an investigation on their behalf, probably involving surveillance footage revision so they can check that on the day of the events, your car entered the lot without the particular piece of damage.



                                  On the bright side, such investigation may prove your boss to be the culprit (although I am unsure as to what access you may have to the recordings); but, if this is the case, it does not matter as per the explained above: in the case of a parking lot, damages shall be covered by the caretakers, not the actual authors (if any) of the damages; so I would not address the situation with your boss in any case. Of course you can argue that she could have told you and then make ends meet with the parking caretakers, but that's beyond the point as far as workpplace relationships go.






                                  share|improve this answer



















                                  • 3





                                    I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                    – Laconic Droid
                                    11 hours ago











                                  • @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                    – the dark wanderer
                                    4 hours ago
















                                  0














                                  IANAL, but I have some experience with this kind of situations.



                                  On the side of damage coverage: Depending on your jurisdiction, the way to go with car incidents happening in lots is to document the damage and file a complaint to the owners/caretakers of the lot. Especially if it's a ticketed lot, it is their responsibility to cover the damages, as from the very moment you pay, this constitutes a binding agreement that they are taking care of your vehicle, so any damages not directly your fault (e.g. you scratching your car against a column would not qualify, but a random stranger scratching it with their keys or car would) should be covered by them. The problem here is that you did not document/file the complaint the moment it happened and instead drove away, only to get back later. You can still fill the complaint, but any hopes of getting your damage covered will entail an investigation on their behalf, probably involving surveillance footage revision so they can check that on the day of the events, your car entered the lot without the particular piece of damage.



                                  On the bright side, such investigation may prove your boss to be the culprit (although I am unsure as to what access you may have to the recordings); but, if this is the case, it does not matter as per the explained above: in the case of a parking lot, damages shall be covered by the caretakers, not the actual authors (if any) of the damages; so I would not address the situation with your boss in any case. Of course you can argue that she could have told you and then make ends meet with the parking caretakers, but that's beyond the point as far as workpplace relationships go.






                                  share|improve this answer



















                                  • 3





                                    I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                    – Laconic Droid
                                    11 hours ago











                                  • @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                    – the dark wanderer
                                    4 hours ago














                                  0












                                  0








                                  0







                                  IANAL, but I have some experience with this kind of situations.



                                  On the side of damage coverage: Depending on your jurisdiction, the way to go with car incidents happening in lots is to document the damage and file a complaint to the owners/caretakers of the lot. Especially if it's a ticketed lot, it is their responsibility to cover the damages, as from the very moment you pay, this constitutes a binding agreement that they are taking care of your vehicle, so any damages not directly your fault (e.g. you scratching your car against a column would not qualify, but a random stranger scratching it with their keys or car would) should be covered by them. The problem here is that you did not document/file the complaint the moment it happened and instead drove away, only to get back later. You can still fill the complaint, but any hopes of getting your damage covered will entail an investigation on their behalf, probably involving surveillance footage revision so they can check that on the day of the events, your car entered the lot without the particular piece of damage.



                                  On the bright side, such investigation may prove your boss to be the culprit (although I am unsure as to what access you may have to the recordings); but, if this is the case, it does not matter as per the explained above: in the case of a parking lot, damages shall be covered by the caretakers, not the actual authors (if any) of the damages; so I would not address the situation with your boss in any case. Of course you can argue that she could have told you and then make ends meet with the parking caretakers, but that's beyond the point as far as workpplace relationships go.






                                  share|improve this answer













                                  IANAL, but I have some experience with this kind of situations.



                                  On the side of damage coverage: Depending on your jurisdiction, the way to go with car incidents happening in lots is to document the damage and file a complaint to the owners/caretakers of the lot. Especially if it's a ticketed lot, it is their responsibility to cover the damages, as from the very moment you pay, this constitutes a binding agreement that they are taking care of your vehicle, so any damages not directly your fault (e.g. you scratching your car against a column would not qualify, but a random stranger scratching it with their keys or car would) should be covered by them. The problem here is that you did not document/file the complaint the moment it happened and instead drove away, only to get back later. You can still fill the complaint, but any hopes of getting your damage covered will entail an investigation on their behalf, probably involving surveillance footage revision so they can check that on the day of the events, your car entered the lot without the particular piece of damage.



                                  On the bright side, such investigation may prove your boss to be the culprit (although I am unsure as to what access you may have to the recordings); but, if this is the case, it does not matter as per the explained above: in the case of a parking lot, damages shall be covered by the caretakers, not the actual authors (if any) of the damages; so I would not address the situation with your boss in any case. Of course you can argue that she could have told you and then make ends meet with the parking caretakers, but that's beyond the point as far as workpplace relationships go.







                                  share|improve this answer












                                  share|improve this answer



                                  share|improve this answer










                                  answered 13 hours ago









                                  busmanbusman

                                  1214




                                  1214








                                  • 3





                                    I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                    – Laconic Droid
                                    11 hours ago











                                  • @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                    – the dark wanderer
                                    4 hours ago














                                  • 3





                                    I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                    – Laconic Droid
                                    11 hours ago











                                  • @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                    – the dark wanderer
                                    4 hours ago








                                  3




                                  3





                                  I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                  – Laconic Droid
                                  11 hours ago





                                  I've never seen a public parking lot in the US be anything other than "owner assumes all risk of theft or damage".

                                  – Laconic Droid
                                  11 hours ago













                                  @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                  – the dark wanderer
                                  4 hours ago





                                  @LaconicDroid Those liability waiver signs don't always hold up in court, though, if there is reason to think the lot/owners were negligent or reckless (like if they say or imply they have attendants and then left it unstaffed or whatever). Suing them is not a good approach to this situation in most cases, regardless, or else the querent would already be considering it, though.

                                  – the dark wanderer
                                  4 hours ago











                                  0














                                  To be honest, I somewhat disagree with others recommending absolutely avoiding the HR. It depends on your course of action. I would approach that person first and ask if it was her perhaps and maybe an amicable solution can be achieved.



                                  If she denies responsibility, then file a police report and give them facts, i.e. that you thought it was your boss, however she denies responsibility, so you do not really know - this may point them to her direction. In that case I would also mention your course of action to your boss to prepare her that someone may ask her about it. This is obviously very thin ice, but I would mention it was necessary to file report to the police e.g. for better possibility of getting something from the insurance and you did have to state all the facts.



                                  If, in fact, it gets confirmed that it was your boss who damaged your car, now it does become a workplace issue and you should talk to the HR. You may have an open, potentially legal conflict with someone in your line of management, so the HR might consider taking action to stop it being a workplace issue, e.g. proposing to reassign either of you so that the company is not in this sticky position. There are typically HR policies forbidding fraternising / love relationships between managers and direct reports to avoid protectionism, but I guess the only reason they do not mention relationships based on personal/non-workplace hatred is that it would be somehow weird, but it is pretty much the same thing and it should be avoided.






                                  share|improve this answer




























                                    0














                                    To be honest, I somewhat disagree with others recommending absolutely avoiding the HR. It depends on your course of action. I would approach that person first and ask if it was her perhaps and maybe an amicable solution can be achieved.



                                    If she denies responsibility, then file a police report and give them facts, i.e. that you thought it was your boss, however she denies responsibility, so you do not really know - this may point them to her direction. In that case I would also mention your course of action to your boss to prepare her that someone may ask her about it. This is obviously very thin ice, but I would mention it was necessary to file report to the police e.g. for better possibility of getting something from the insurance and you did have to state all the facts.



                                    If, in fact, it gets confirmed that it was your boss who damaged your car, now it does become a workplace issue and you should talk to the HR. You may have an open, potentially legal conflict with someone in your line of management, so the HR might consider taking action to stop it being a workplace issue, e.g. proposing to reassign either of you so that the company is not in this sticky position. There are typically HR policies forbidding fraternising / love relationships between managers and direct reports to avoid protectionism, but I guess the only reason they do not mention relationships based on personal/non-workplace hatred is that it would be somehow weird, but it is pretty much the same thing and it should be avoided.






                                    share|improve this answer


























                                      0












                                      0








                                      0







                                      To be honest, I somewhat disagree with others recommending absolutely avoiding the HR. It depends on your course of action. I would approach that person first and ask if it was her perhaps and maybe an amicable solution can be achieved.



                                      If she denies responsibility, then file a police report and give them facts, i.e. that you thought it was your boss, however she denies responsibility, so you do not really know - this may point them to her direction. In that case I would also mention your course of action to your boss to prepare her that someone may ask her about it. This is obviously very thin ice, but I would mention it was necessary to file report to the police e.g. for better possibility of getting something from the insurance and you did have to state all the facts.



                                      If, in fact, it gets confirmed that it was your boss who damaged your car, now it does become a workplace issue and you should talk to the HR. You may have an open, potentially legal conflict with someone in your line of management, so the HR might consider taking action to stop it being a workplace issue, e.g. proposing to reassign either of you so that the company is not in this sticky position. There are typically HR policies forbidding fraternising / love relationships between managers and direct reports to avoid protectionism, but I guess the only reason they do not mention relationships based on personal/non-workplace hatred is that it would be somehow weird, but it is pretty much the same thing and it should be avoided.






                                      share|improve this answer













                                      To be honest, I somewhat disagree with others recommending absolutely avoiding the HR. It depends on your course of action. I would approach that person first and ask if it was her perhaps and maybe an amicable solution can be achieved.



                                      If she denies responsibility, then file a police report and give them facts, i.e. that you thought it was your boss, however she denies responsibility, so you do not really know - this may point them to her direction. In that case I would also mention your course of action to your boss to prepare her that someone may ask her about it. This is obviously very thin ice, but I would mention it was necessary to file report to the police e.g. for better possibility of getting something from the insurance and you did have to state all the facts.



                                      If, in fact, it gets confirmed that it was your boss who damaged your car, now it does become a workplace issue and you should talk to the HR. You may have an open, potentially legal conflict with someone in your line of management, so the HR might consider taking action to stop it being a workplace issue, e.g. proposing to reassign either of you so that the company is not in this sticky position. There are typically HR policies forbidding fraternising / love relationships between managers and direct reports to avoid protectionism, but I guess the only reason they do not mention relationships based on personal/non-workplace hatred is that it would be somehow weird, but it is pretty much the same thing and it should be avoided.







                                      share|improve this answer












                                      share|improve this answer



                                      share|improve this answer










                                      answered 6 hours ago









                                      ElesharEleshar

                                      24416




                                      24416






















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