How to deal with an incendiary email that was recalled
I recently received a critical email from someone who works at a company I deal with. It made a number of broad and inaccurate criticisms of some work I'd done. Copying in several managers for good measure
After of read it I got a mail recall notice, saying that the sender was recalling the mail and to disregard it. I guess it was meant delete automatically but didn't as I'm on a different mail system.
A day later they have sent nothing else.
But how should I respond, I feel these criticisms are still hanging but have no idea who read the email and don't know how to respond appropriately.
Should I just ignore it?
professionalism communication colleagues email
add a comment |
I recently received a critical email from someone who works at a company I deal with. It made a number of broad and inaccurate criticisms of some work I'd done. Copying in several managers for good measure
After of read it I got a mail recall notice, saying that the sender was recalling the mail and to disregard it. I guess it was meant delete automatically but didn't as I'm on a different mail system.
A day later they have sent nothing else.
But how should I respond, I feel these criticisms are still hanging but have no idea who read the email and don't know how to respond appropriately.
Should I just ignore it?
professionalism communication colleagues email
So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago
add a comment |
I recently received a critical email from someone who works at a company I deal with. It made a number of broad and inaccurate criticisms of some work I'd done. Copying in several managers for good measure
After of read it I got a mail recall notice, saying that the sender was recalling the mail and to disregard it. I guess it was meant delete automatically but didn't as I'm on a different mail system.
A day later they have sent nothing else.
But how should I respond, I feel these criticisms are still hanging but have no idea who read the email and don't know how to respond appropriately.
Should I just ignore it?
professionalism communication colleagues email
I recently received a critical email from someone who works at a company I deal with. It made a number of broad and inaccurate criticisms of some work I'd done. Copying in several managers for good measure
After of read it I got a mail recall notice, saying that the sender was recalling the mail and to disregard it. I guess it was meant delete automatically but didn't as I'm on a different mail system.
A day later they have sent nothing else.
But how should I respond, I feel these criticisms are still hanging but have no idea who read the email and don't know how to respond appropriately.
Should I just ignore it?
professionalism communication colleagues email
professionalism communication colleagues email
edited 2 hours ago
DarkCygnus
37.3k1777159
37.3k1777159
asked 2 hours ago
Jeremy FrenchJeremy French
2,8361120
2,8361120
So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago
add a comment |
So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago
So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago
add a comment |
7 Answers
7
active
oldest
votes
Should I just ignore it?
Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I suggest you don't reply back and let it be, but still keep in mind what happened in case you notice any further suspicious or inaccurate activity from this person.
To make things crystal clear, you could also approach this person privately (perhaps go to their desk, or IM them directly) and tell them you noticed the email and its retraction, and would like to know the reason and if there is still something you can do to address the things stated in the email.
Keep in mind that, if you do this you have to be careful and polite, and only do it if you sense this person will not take it the wrong way.
As mentioned in comments, it is probable that the sender didn't intend to send the email to you in first place, so tread lightly here. Perhaps the "safest" course of action, as suggested before, would be not to reply back and be prepared for what you think could come based on the contents and intention of the email.
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
|
show 3 more comments
Do not respond to the email via a reply. They retracted it so they realized it was the wrong thing to do.
But, do not ignore the email either. For right or wrong, they feel/felt that you didn't perform adequately. Put aside yourself for a moment and really consider if they have ANY valid points at all. If they do, these are things you need to improve upon. If not, then chalk it up to an overly emotional/critical response (which is why they recalled it).
add a comment |
Prepare a response, but do not send. Yet.
You have the luxury of knowing what was going to be sent and to who; as well it seems they believe you haven't seen it.
If there are any valid criticisms (however poorly phrased), focus on how you can improve on these areas so when/if the e-mail is sent properly you will have addressed that concern and demonstrated your ability in your office.
I do not recommend responding to the e-mail. It was not meant to be sent and not meant to be responded to. Consider it a little window into how someone might think about your performance and how you should regard that person from now on.
add a comment |
If your direct manager didn't receive it AND still have a copy, forward it to them and ask them for a meeting to discuss the contents. Before the meeting go through the email carefully and make notes for each point with facts to back up any disagreements with their statements. During the meeting, go through your notes and present your case. Do it as unemotionally as possible.
Ask your manager if there's anything left that s/he is concerned about and what your next steps should be. I would assume (hope?) that your manager will handle it from here.
add a comment |
An example based on something I've observed to happen in the past, similarly regarding feedback on a collaborative project.
You will know better from the context, but it may have been that the email was written as a joke, to let off some frustration connected with your project, but never intended to be sent. Then later the writer hit 'send' rather than 'delete', by accident.
As a result of this experience (the repercussions I wasn't party to, but it wasn't a disaster), I always make sure to delete the 'to' when writing a reply to an email in anger (or just drafting something confrontational).
add a comment |
Look at the possibilities.
1) The email deletion was specific to you, the email was still sent to the managers.
2) The deletion was for everyone, but it also didn't work for everyone else, so the email was still received by one or more of the managers.
3) The deletion was effective for everyone else and no-one but the writer ever saw the email.
As OP says there were "broad and inaccurate criticisms" if this was within your own company I would do a measured response, pointing out why those comments are wrong. If situation 1 or 2 is the case, this is probably the most appropriate response. In situation 3, this would mean exposing the original criticisms to managers who hadn't actually seen them, but if the writer was mentioning it in an email, it may already be muttered about at their workplace and still gives you a chance to get your point of view out there.
However, because it was in a different company, you should let your own direct manager know and discuss with them if they are okay with your planned response before doing anything.
You could also send a short email to the writer, saying "I saw this and think there are some misunderstandings, I'll send out a more detailed email to all the recipients to deal with it point by point." That gives them a heads up that you received the email and gives them a chance to let their managers know if they goofed in sending the original email out at all.
add a comment |
The accepted answer suggests
this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I don't think that's very probable. It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver, which they hadn't intended. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include him among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently in offices.
It's hard to believe the colleague took time to write a long, detailed email and then simply decided everything they wrote was wrong and shouldn't have been written.
So how should the OP react?
Constructively. He shouldn't pretend he hasn't got anything.
Instead, he should 1) talk to the person and take a stance on the criticism, or ever 2) reply to everybody.
In both situations they should say/ write something like:
I realize this email has been retracted after being sent, but I couldn't help and read it.
Then the OP should take a fair stance on the criticism, not acting defensively but also not accepting the blame for what wasn't his fault. He should propose a solution how the cooperation between him and the colleague can be made better in the future.
Which should he chose, 1) or 2)? It depends on the situation. We don't have enough details on the political situation in their workplace and their political strength to tell him which solution makes more sense.
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
add a comment |
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7 Answers
7
active
oldest
votes
7 Answers
7
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
Should I just ignore it?
Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I suggest you don't reply back and let it be, but still keep in mind what happened in case you notice any further suspicious or inaccurate activity from this person.
To make things crystal clear, you could also approach this person privately (perhaps go to their desk, or IM them directly) and tell them you noticed the email and its retraction, and would like to know the reason and if there is still something you can do to address the things stated in the email.
Keep in mind that, if you do this you have to be careful and polite, and only do it if you sense this person will not take it the wrong way.
As mentioned in comments, it is probable that the sender didn't intend to send the email to you in first place, so tread lightly here. Perhaps the "safest" course of action, as suggested before, would be not to reply back and be prepared for what you think could come based on the contents and intention of the email.
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
|
show 3 more comments
Should I just ignore it?
Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I suggest you don't reply back and let it be, but still keep in mind what happened in case you notice any further suspicious or inaccurate activity from this person.
To make things crystal clear, you could also approach this person privately (perhaps go to their desk, or IM them directly) and tell them you noticed the email and its retraction, and would like to know the reason and if there is still something you can do to address the things stated in the email.
Keep in mind that, if you do this you have to be careful and polite, and only do it if you sense this person will not take it the wrong way.
As mentioned in comments, it is probable that the sender didn't intend to send the email to you in first place, so tread lightly here. Perhaps the "safest" course of action, as suggested before, would be not to reply back and be prepared for what you think could come based on the contents and intention of the email.
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
|
show 3 more comments
Should I just ignore it?
Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I suggest you don't reply back and let it be, but still keep in mind what happened in case you notice any further suspicious or inaccurate activity from this person.
To make things crystal clear, you could also approach this person privately (perhaps go to their desk, or IM them directly) and tell them you noticed the email and its retraction, and would like to know the reason and if there is still something you can do to address the things stated in the email.
Keep in mind that, if you do this you have to be careful and polite, and only do it if you sense this person will not take it the wrong way.
As mentioned in comments, it is probable that the sender didn't intend to send the email to you in first place, so tread lightly here. Perhaps the "safest" course of action, as suggested before, would be not to reply back and be prepared for what you think could come based on the contents and intention of the email.
Should I just ignore it?
Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I suggest you don't reply back and let it be, but still keep in mind what happened in case you notice any further suspicious or inaccurate activity from this person.
To make things crystal clear, you could also approach this person privately (perhaps go to their desk, or IM them directly) and tell them you noticed the email and its retraction, and would like to know the reason and if there is still something you can do to address the things stated in the email.
Keep in mind that, if you do this you have to be careful and polite, and only do it if you sense this person will not take it the wrong way.
As mentioned in comments, it is probable that the sender didn't intend to send the email to you in first place, so tread lightly here. Perhaps the "safest" course of action, as suggested before, would be not to reply back and be prepared for what you think could come based on the contents and intention of the email.
edited 55 mins ago
answered 2 hours ago
DarkCygnusDarkCygnus
37.3k1777159
37.3k1777159
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
|
show 3 more comments
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
4
4
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
I didn't downvote because of some useful comments. However, it's probably not a good idea to contact the person. Either they felt they committed a grave mistake and will be terribly embarrassed, or they didn't, and then you might enter a charged discussion. You now know that there is a real or perceived problem. You can rectify this if you think it is appropriate. But they do not know whether you know and how you will react to it, and that puts you at an advantage now. You can now prepare any counterargument ahead of time in case you should ever be confronted.
– Captain Emacs
1 hour ago
9
9
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
"Chances are that this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate". It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include them among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently.
– BigMadAndy
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@CaptainEmacs yes, approaching the person should be handled carefully, if done... OP could just leave it be and don't approach the person, but still keep in mind the incident to watch their backs and be prepared if something happens again
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
@BigMadAndy indeed, that could be another probable option. What matters is what OP can do know, which is be aware of this and prepare for the case this continued
– DarkCygnus
1 hour ago
1
1
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
@CaptainEmacs besides, the email was already sent. OP has the right to know why it was sent in first place. If there is an existing problem perceived between OP and the sender it should be resolved, not ignored.
– DarkCygnus
55 mins ago
|
show 3 more comments
Do not respond to the email via a reply. They retracted it so they realized it was the wrong thing to do.
But, do not ignore the email either. For right or wrong, they feel/felt that you didn't perform adequately. Put aside yourself for a moment and really consider if they have ANY valid points at all. If they do, these are things you need to improve upon. If not, then chalk it up to an overly emotional/critical response (which is why they recalled it).
add a comment |
Do not respond to the email via a reply. They retracted it so they realized it was the wrong thing to do.
But, do not ignore the email either. For right or wrong, they feel/felt that you didn't perform adequately. Put aside yourself for a moment and really consider if they have ANY valid points at all. If they do, these are things you need to improve upon. If not, then chalk it up to an overly emotional/critical response (which is why they recalled it).
add a comment |
Do not respond to the email via a reply. They retracted it so they realized it was the wrong thing to do.
But, do not ignore the email either. For right or wrong, they feel/felt that you didn't perform adequately. Put aside yourself for a moment and really consider if they have ANY valid points at all. If they do, these are things you need to improve upon. If not, then chalk it up to an overly emotional/critical response (which is why they recalled it).
Do not respond to the email via a reply. They retracted it so they realized it was the wrong thing to do.
But, do not ignore the email either. For right or wrong, they feel/felt that you didn't perform adequately. Put aside yourself for a moment and really consider if they have ANY valid points at all. If they do, these are things you need to improve upon. If not, then chalk it up to an overly emotional/critical response (which is why they recalled it).
answered 2 hours ago
UnhandledExcepSeanUnhandledExcepSean
3,23111323
3,23111323
add a comment |
add a comment |
Prepare a response, but do not send. Yet.
You have the luxury of knowing what was going to be sent and to who; as well it seems they believe you haven't seen it.
If there are any valid criticisms (however poorly phrased), focus on how you can improve on these areas so when/if the e-mail is sent properly you will have addressed that concern and demonstrated your ability in your office.
I do not recommend responding to the e-mail. It was not meant to be sent and not meant to be responded to. Consider it a little window into how someone might think about your performance and how you should regard that person from now on.
add a comment |
Prepare a response, but do not send. Yet.
You have the luxury of knowing what was going to be sent and to who; as well it seems they believe you haven't seen it.
If there are any valid criticisms (however poorly phrased), focus on how you can improve on these areas so when/if the e-mail is sent properly you will have addressed that concern and demonstrated your ability in your office.
I do not recommend responding to the e-mail. It was not meant to be sent and not meant to be responded to. Consider it a little window into how someone might think about your performance and how you should regard that person from now on.
add a comment |
Prepare a response, but do not send. Yet.
You have the luxury of knowing what was going to be sent and to who; as well it seems they believe you haven't seen it.
If there are any valid criticisms (however poorly phrased), focus on how you can improve on these areas so when/if the e-mail is sent properly you will have addressed that concern and demonstrated your ability in your office.
I do not recommend responding to the e-mail. It was not meant to be sent and not meant to be responded to. Consider it a little window into how someone might think about your performance and how you should regard that person from now on.
Prepare a response, but do not send. Yet.
You have the luxury of knowing what was going to be sent and to who; as well it seems they believe you haven't seen it.
If there are any valid criticisms (however poorly phrased), focus on how you can improve on these areas so when/if the e-mail is sent properly you will have addressed that concern and demonstrated your ability in your office.
I do not recommend responding to the e-mail. It was not meant to be sent and not meant to be responded to. Consider it a little window into how someone might think about your performance and how you should regard that person from now on.
answered 2 hours ago
MikeyMikey
676410
676410
add a comment |
add a comment |
If your direct manager didn't receive it AND still have a copy, forward it to them and ask them for a meeting to discuss the contents. Before the meeting go through the email carefully and make notes for each point with facts to back up any disagreements with their statements. During the meeting, go through your notes and present your case. Do it as unemotionally as possible.
Ask your manager if there's anything left that s/he is concerned about and what your next steps should be. I would assume (hope?) that your manager will handle it from here.
add a comment |
If your direct manager didn't receive it AND still have a copy, forward it to them and ask them for a meeting to discuss the contents. Before the meeting go through the email carefully and make notes for each point with facts to back up any disagreements with their statements. During the meeting, go through your notes and present your case. Do it as unemotionally as possible.
Ask your manager if there's anything left that s/he is concerned about and what your next steps should be. I would assume (hope?) that your manager will handle it from here.
add a comment |
If your direct manager didn't receive it AND still have a copy, forward it to them and ask them for a meeting to discuss the contents. Before the meeting go through the email carefully and make notes for each point with facts to back up any disagreements with their statements. During the meeting, go through your notes and present your case. Do it as unemotionally as possible.
Ask your manager if there's anything left that s/he is concerned about and what your next steps should be. I would assume (hope?) that your manager will handle it from here.
If your direct manager didn't receive it AND still have a copy, forward it to them and ask them for a meeting to discuss the contents. Before the meeting go through the email carefully and make notes for each point with facts to back up any disagreements with their statements. During the meeting, go through your notes and present your case. Do it as unemotionally as possible.
Ask your manager if there's anything left that s/he is concerned about and what your next steps should be. I would assume (hope?) that your manager will handle it from here.
answered 1 hour ago
JeffCJeffC
1,023410
1,023410
add a comment |
add a comment |
An example based on something I've observed to happen in the past, similarly regarding feedback on a collaborative project.
You will know better from the context, but it may have been that the email was written as a joke, to let off some frustration connected with your project, but never intended to be sent. Then later the writer hit 'send' rather than 'delete', by accident.
As a result of this experience (the repercussions I wasn't party to, but it wasn't a disaster), I always make sure to delete the 'to' when writing a reply to an email in anger (or just drafting something confrontational).
add a comment |
An example based on something I've observed to happen in the past, similarly regarding feedback on a collaborative project.
You will know better from the context, but it may have been that the email was written as a joke, to let off some frustration connected with your project, but never intended to be sent. Then later the writer hit 'send' rather than 'delete', by accident.
As a result of this experience (the repercussions I wasn't party to, but it wasn't a disaster), I always make sure to delete the 'to' when writing a reply to an email in anger (or just drafting something confrontational).
add a comment |
An example based on something I've observed to happen in the past, similarly regarding feedback on a collaborative project.
You will know better from the context, but it may have been that the email was written as a joke, to let off some frustration connected with your project, but never intended to be sent. Then later the writer hit 'send' rather than 'delete', by accident.
As a result of this experience (the repercussions I wasn't party to, but it wasn't a disaster), I always make sure to delete the 'to' when writing a reply to an email in anger (or just drafting something confrontational).
An example based on something I've observed to happen in the past, similarly regarding feedback on a collaborative project.
You will know better from the context, but it may have been that the email was written as a joke, to let off some frustration connected with your project, but never intended to be sent. Then later the writer hit 'send' rather than 'delete', by accident.
As a result of this experience (the repercussions I wasn't party to, but it wasn't a disaster), I always make sure to delete the 'to' when writing a reply to an email in anger (or just drafting something confrontational).
answered 1 hour ago
Sean HoulihaneSean Houlihane
859513
859513
add a comment |
add a comment |
Look at the possibilities.
1) The email deletion was specific to you, the email was still sent to the managers.
2) The deletion was for everyone, but it also didn't work for everyone else, so the email was still received by one or more of the managers.
3) The deletion was effective for everyone else and no-one but the writer ever saw the email.
As OP says there were "broad and inaccurate criticisms" if this was within your own company I would do a measured response, pointing out why those comments are wrong. If situation 1 or 2 is the case, this is probably the most appropriate response. In situation 3, this would mean exposing the original criticisms to managers who hadn't actually seen them, but if the writer was mentioning it in an email, it may already be muttered about at their workplace and still gives you a chance to get your point of view out there.
However, because it was in a different company, you should let your own direct manager know and discuss with them if they are okay with your planned response before doing anything.
You could also send a short email to the writer, saying "I saw this and think there are some misunderstandings, I'll send out a more detailed email to all the recipients to deal with it point by point." That gives them a heads up that you received the email and gives them a chance to let their managers know if they goofed in sending the original email out at all.
add a comment |
Look at the possibilities.
1) The email deletion was specific to you, the email was still sent to the managers.
2) The deletion was for everyone, but it also didn't work for everyone else, so the email was still received by one or more of the managers.
3) The deletion was effective for everyone else and no-one but the writer ever saw the email.
As OP says there were "broad and inaccurate criticisms" if this was within your own company I would do a measured response, pointing out why those comments are wrong. If situation 1 or 2 is the case, this is probably the most appropriate response. In situation 3, this would mean exposing the original criticisms to managers who hadn't actually seen them, but if the writer was mentioning it in an email, it may already be muttered about at their workplace and still gives you a chance to get your point of view out there.
However, because it was in a different company, you should let your own direct manager know and discuss with them if they are okay with your planned response before doing anything.
You could also send a short email to the writer, saying "I saw this and think there are some misunderstandings, I'll send out a more detailed email to all the recipients to deal with it point by point." That gives them a heads up that you received the email and gives them a chance to let their managers know if they goofed in sending the original email out at all.
add a comment |
Look at the possibilities.
1) The email deletion was specific to you, the email was still sent to the managers.
2) The deletion was for everyone, but it also didn't work for everyone else, so the email was still received by one or more of the managers.
3) The deletion was effective for everyone else and no-one but the writer ever saw the email.
As OP says there were "broad and inaccurate criticisms" if this was within your own company I would do a measured response, pointing out why those comments are wrong. If situation 1 or 2 is the case, this is probably the most appropriate response. In situation 3, this would mean exposing the original criticisms to managers who hadn't actually seen them, but if the writer was mentioning it in an email, it may already be muttered about at their workplace and still gives you a chance to get your point of view out there.
However, because it was in a different company, you should let your own direct manager know and discuss with them if they are okay with your planned response before doing anything.
You could also send a short email to the writer, saying "I saw this and think there are some misunderstandings, I'll send out a more detailed email to all the recipients to deal with it point by point." That gives them a heads up that you received the email and gives them a chance to let their managers know if they goofed in sending the original email out at all.
Look at the possibilities.
1) The email deletion was specific to you, the email was still sent to the managers.
2) The deletion was for everyone, but it also didn't work for everyone else, so the email was still received by one or more of the managers.
3) The deletion was effective for everyone else and no-one but the writer ever saw the email.
As OP says there were "broad and inaccurate criticisms" if this was within your own company I would do a measured response, pointing out why those comments are wrong. If situation 1 or 2 is the case, this is probably the most appropriate response. In situation 3, this would mean exposing the original criticisms to managers who hadn't actually seen them, but if the writer was mentioning it in an email, it may already be muttered about at their workplace and still gives you a chance to get your point of view out there.
However, because it was in a different company, you should let your own direct manager know and discuss with them if they are okay with your planned response before doing anything.
You could also send a short email to the writer, saying "I saw this and think there are some misunderstandings, I'll send out a more detailed email to all the recipients to deal with it point by point." That gives them a heads up that you received the email and gives them a chance to let their managers know if they goofed in sending the original email out at all.
answered 5 mins ago
DragonelDragonel
62258
62258
add a comment |
add a comment |
The accepted answer suggests
this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I don't think that's very probable. It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver, which they hadn't intended. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include him among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently in offices.
It's hard to believe the colleague took time to write a long, detailed email and then simply decided everything they wrote was wrong and shouldn't have been written.
So how should the OP react?
Constructively. He shouldn't pretend he hasn't got anything.
Instead, he should 1) talk to the person and take a stance on the criticism, or ever 2) reply to everybody.
In both situations they should say/ write something like:
I realize this email has been retracted after being sent, but I couldn't help and read it.
Then the OP should take a fair stance on the criticism, not acting defensively but also not accepting the blame for what wasn't his fault. He should propose a solution how the cooperation between him and the colleague can be made better in the future.
Which should he chose, 1) or 2)? It depends on the situation. We don't have enough details on the political situation in their workplace and their political strength to tell him which solution makes more sense.
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
add a comment |
The accepted answer suggests
this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I don't think that's very probable. It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver, which they hadn't intended. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include him among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently in offices.
It's hard to believe the colleague took time to write a long, detailed email and then simply decided everything they wrote was wrong and shouldn't have been written.
So how should the OP react?
Constructively. He shouldn't pretend he hasn't got anything.
Instead, he should 1) talk to the person and take a stance on the criticism, or ever 2) reply to everybody.
In both situations they should say/ write something like:
I realize this email has been retracted after being sent, but I couldn't help and read it.
Then the OP should take a fair stance on the criticism, not acting defensively but also not accepting the blame for what wasn't his fault. He should propose a solution how the cooperation between him and the colleague can be made better in the future.
Which should he chose, 1) or 2)? It depends on the situation. We don't have enough details on the political situation in their workplace and their political strength to tell him which solution makes more sense.
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
add a comment |
The accepted answer suggests
this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I don't think that's very probable. It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver, which they hadn't intended. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include him among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently in offices.
It's hard to believe the colleague took time to write a long, detailed email and then simply decided everything they wrote was wrong and shouldn't have been written.
So how should the OP react?
Constructively. He shouldn't pretend he hasn't got anything.
Instead, he should 1) talk to the person and take a stance on the criticism, or ever 2) reply to everybody.
In both situations they should say/ write something like:
I realize this email has been retracted after being sent, but I couldn't help and read it.
Then the OP should take a fair stance on the criticism, not acting defensively but also not accepting the blame for what wasn't his fault. He should propose a solution how the cooperation between him and the colleague can be made better in the future.
Which should he chose, 1) or 2)? It depends on the situation. We don't have enough details on the political situation in their workplace and their political strength to tell him which solution makes more sense.
The accepted answer suggests
this person realized that their criticism was broad and inaccurate after sending the email (and perhaps checking your work again), and retracted the email when they found out.
I don't think that's very probable. It's more probable they realized they included the OP as a receiver, which they hadn't intended. They wanted to complain about the OP to other people, not include him among the receivers. This kind of mistakes happens so frequently in offices.
It's hard to believe the colleague took time to write a long, detailed email and then simply decided everything they wrote was wrong and shouldn't have been written.
So how should the OP react?
Constructively. He shouldn't pretend he hasn't got anything.
Instead, he should 1) talk to the person and take a stance on the criticism, or ever 2) reply to everybody.
In both situations they should say/ write something like:
I realize this email has been retracted after being sent, but I couldn't help and read it.
Then the OP should take a fair stance on the criticism, not acting defensively but also not accepting the blame for what wasn't his fault. He should propose a solution how the cooperation between him and the colleague can be made better in the future.
Which should he chose, 1) or 2)? It depends on the situation. We don't have enough details on the political situation in their workplace and their political strength to tell him which solution makes more sense.
answered 56 mins ago
BigMadAndyBigMadAndy
13.5k112362
13.5k112362
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
add a comment |
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
1
1
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
Criticising another answer to promote your own is bad form, perhaps you should edit out the reference to the other answer. Yours should be able to stand on it's own.
– Richard U
36 mins ago
add a comment |
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So, you still have that email in your bin? Did the sender reached out to you in any other way after this incident? What is your relationship with the sender
– DarkCygnus
2 hours ago
It didn't delete for me so I still have it they have not reached out since. The sender is part of a distant internal team.
– Jeremy French
2 hours ago
Did they address it to you specifically and cc the managers? Or were you part of a big list? If it's the latter it's more likely the sender had a freudian slip moment and included your name by accident, and later tried to undo their actions hoping you wouldn't notice.
– Tasos Papastylianou
5 mins ago