Is using an 'empty' metaphor considered bad style?












1















I just had this sentence off my head:




A crown of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its
way.




What I mean by empty metaphor is a metaphor that doesn't really have any meaning or even purpose. The same sentence could be replaced with the following:




A circle of fire spread through the country consuming everything on
its way.




Also, I don't even think crown would make sense even if the "fire" was spread by an evil king. What do you think?










share|improve this question




















  • 2





    just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

    – BKlassen
    52 mins ago











  • Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

    – repomonster
    48 mins ago






  • 2





    One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

    – BKlassen
    42 mins ago











  • That's not too bad.

    – repomonster
    41 mins ago






  • 2





    do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

    – BKlassen
    37 mins ago
















1















I just had this sentence off my head:




A crown of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its
way.




What I mean by empty metaphor is a metaphor that doesn't really have any meaning or even purpose. The same sentence could be replaced with the following:




A circle of fire spread through the country consuming everything on
its way.




Also, I don't even think crown would make sense even if the "fire" was spread by an evil king. What do you think?










share|improve this question




















  • 2





    just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

    – BKlassen
    52 mins ago











  • Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

    – repomonster
    48 mins ago






  • 2





    One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

    – BKlassen
    42 mins ago











  • That's not too bad.

    – repomonster
    41 mins ago






  • 2





    do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

    – BKlassen
    37 mins ago














1












1








1








I just had this sentence off my head:




A crown of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its
way.




What I mean by empty metaphor is a metaphor that doesn't really have any meaning or even purpose. The same sentence could be replaced with the following:




A circle of fire spread through the country consuming everything on
its way.




Also, I don't even think crown would make sense even if the "fire" was spread by an evil king. What do you think?










share|improve this question
















I just had this sentence off my head:




A crown of fire spread through the country consuming everything on its
way.




What I mean by empty metaphor is a metaphor that doesn't really have any meaning or even purpose. The same sentence could be replaced with the following:




A circle of fire spread through the country consuming everything on
its way.




Also, I don't even think crown would make sense even if the "fire" was spread by an evil king. What do you think?







creative-writing style metaphor






share|improve this question















share|improve this question













share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited 1 hour ago









linksassin

456213




456213










asked 1 hour ago









repomonsterrepomonster

1,078423




1,078423








  • 2





    just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

    – BKlassen
    52 mins ago











  • Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

    – repomonster
    48 mins ago






  • 2





    One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

    – BKlassen
    42 mins ago











  • That's not too bad.

    – repomonster
    41 mins ago






  • 2





    do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

    – BKlassen
    37 mins ago














  • 2





    just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

    – BKlassen
    52 mins ago











  • Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

    – repomonster
    48 mins ago






  • 2





    One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

    – BKlassen
    42 mins ago











  • That's not too bad.

    – repomonster
    41 mins ago






  • 2





    do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

    – BKlassen
    37 mins ago








2




2





just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

– BKlassen
52 mins ago





just a side note, I consider the sequel to Eragon, Eldest, nearly unreadable with how many pointless metaphors and similes it had. One or two metaphors that don't hit the mark are fine, just don't flood your story with them

– BKlassen
52 mins ago













Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

– repomonster
48 mins ago





Could you give an example just out of curiosity?

– repomonster
48 mins ago




2




2





One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

– BKlassen
42 mins ago





One example that I remember being particularly pointless was 'his fingers were as numb as frozen wood'

– BKlassen
42 mins ago













That's not too bad.

– repomonster
41 mins ago





That's not too bad.

– repomonster
41 mins ago




2




2





do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

– BKlassen
37 mins ago





do inanimate objects become numb though? I think not, making it a poor analogy and the frozen detail moot

– BKlassen
37 mins ago










3 Answers
3






active

oldest

votes


















4














It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").



That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.






share|improve this answer































    2














    This isn't bad style



    "A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.



    In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.



    More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.






    share|improve this answer































      1














      It's an "Analogy"



      Similes and metaphors are types of analogy. It's still a metaphor because of the sentence structure (it's not a simile).



      When the comparison is really extreme it's called an analogy. The brain has to "reach out" to synaptic connections find the cross-reference how these things are alike, and eventually offers up shapes and colors, like your fire-crown.



      You have an instinct that is telling you these words are associated.



      It's a good instinct. Keep listening!



      It is not "empty", it is loaded with vivid imagery, but also other (surreptitious?) cross-referenced associations like concentration of power, danger, and eminent domain. My brain was delighted. Thank you!



      Compare to this example from the analogy link:




      Night Clouds (By Amy Lowell)

      The white mares of the moon rush along the sky

      Beating their golden hoofs upon the glass Heavens.




      Which is pretty but makes your head hurt if you try to think about it too literally.






      share|improve this answer

























        Your Answer








        StackExchange.ready(function() {
        var channelOptions = {
        tags: "".split(" "),
        id: "166"
        };
        initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);

        StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
        // Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
        if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
        StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
        createEditor();
        });
        }
        else {
        createEditor();
        }
        });

        function createEditor() {
        StackExchange.prepareEditor({
        heartbeatType: 'answer',
        autoActivateHeartbeat: false,
        convertImagesToLinks: false,
        noModals: true,
        showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
        reputationToPostImages: null,
        bindNavPrevention: true,
        postfix: "",
        imageUploader: {
        brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
        contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
        allowUrls: true
        },
        noCode: true, onDemand: true,
        discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
        ,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
        });


        }
        });














        draft saved

        draft discarded


















        StackExchange.ready(
        function () {
        StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fwriting.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f42684%2fis-using-an-empty-metaphor-considered-bad-style%23new-answer', 'question_page');
        }
        );

        Post as a guest















        Required, but never shown

























        3 Answers
        3






        active

        oldest

        votes








        3 Answers
        3






        active

        oldest

        votes









        active

        oldest

        votes






        active

        oldest

        votes









        4














        It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").



        That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.






        share|improve this answer




























          4














          It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").



          That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.






          share|improve this answer


























            4












            4








            4







            It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").



            That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.






            share|improve this answer













            It isn't exactly empty; a spreading circle of fire might look like a growing crown; with high fire on the perimeter and no fire in the middle. (But ending with "on its way" throws me, it should be "consuming everything in its way").



            That said, aside from your example, if your metaphor is obscure and has no obvious application to what is being described, then it breaks the flow of reading because the reader struggles to reconcile this. That would be bad style.







            share|improve this answer












            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer










            answered 1 hour ago









            AmadeusAmadeus

            51.8k466166




            51.8k466166























                2














                This isn't bad style



                "A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.



                In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.



                More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.






                share|improve this answer




























                  2














                  This isn't bad style



                  "A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.



                  In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.



                  More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.






                  share|improve this answer


























                    2












                    2








                    2







                    This isn't bad style



                    "A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.



                    In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.



                    More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.






                    share|improve this answer













                    This isn't bad style



                    "A crown of fire" is a an evocative statement full of imagery and connotations. Instantly, I can imagine the burning ring of flame, progressing outward and reaching up to the sky. The sentence may not make literal sense but certainly is a good description.



                    In contrast "a circle of fire" seems somewhat lame. It describes the physical shape of the fire (potentially 'ring' would be better) but it does little to describe the appearance of the flame.



                    More generally there isn't really such a thing as "bad style" just different style. Whether this is good or not depends on if it fits into the style and structure of the rest of your work. A single empty metaphor in an otherwise literal piece will feel out of place. But if your work is full of this type of description then it will be fine.







                    share|improve this answer












                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer










                    answered 1 hour ago









                    linksassinlinksassin

                    456213




                    456213























                        1














                        It's an "Analogy"



                        Similes and metaphors are types of analogy. It's still a metaphor because of the sentence structure (it's not a simile).



                        When the comparison is really extreme it's called an analogy. The brain has to "reach out" to synaptic connections find the cross-reference how these things are alike, and eventually offers up shapes and colors, like your fire-crown.



                        You have an instinct that is telling you these words are associated.



                        It's a good instinct. Keep listening!



                        It is not "empty", it is loaded with vivid imagery, but also other (surreptitious?) cross-referenced associations like concentration of power, danger, and eminent domain. My brain was delighted. Thank you!



                        Compare to this example from the analogy link:




                        Night Clouds (By Amy Lowell)

                        The white mares of the moon rush along the sky

                        Beating their golden hoofs upon the glass Heavens.




                        Which is pretty but makes your head hurt if you try to think about it too literally.






                        share|improve this answer






























                          1














                          It's an "Analogy"



                          Similes and metaphors are types of analogy. It's still a metaphor because of the sentence structure (it's not a simile).



                          When the comparison is really extreme it's called an analogy. The brain has to "reach out" to synaptic connections find the cross-reference how these things are alike, and eventually offers up shapes and colors, like your fire-crown.



                          You have an instinct that is telling you these words are associated.



                          It's a good instinct. Keep listening!



                          It is not "empty", it is loaded with vivid imagery, but also other (surreptitious?) cross-referenced associations like concentration of power, danger, and eminent domain. My brain was delighted. Thank you!



                          Compare to this example from the analogy link:




                          Night Clouds (By Amy Lowell)

                          The white mares of the moon rush along the sky

                          Beating their golden hoofs upon the glass Heavens.




                          Which is pretty but makes your head hurt if you try to think about it too literally.






                          share|improve this answer




























                            1












                            1








                            1







                            It's an "Analogy"



                            Similes and metaphors are types of analogy. It's still a metaphor because of the sentence structure (it's not a simile).



                            When the comparison is really extreme it's called an analogy. The brain has to "reach out" to synaptic connections find the cross-reference how these things are alike, and eventually offers up shapes and colors, like your fire-crown.



                            You have an instinct that is telling you these words are associated.



                            It's a good instinct. Keep listening!



                            It is not "empty", it is loaded with vivid imagery, but also other (surreptitious?) cross-referenced associations like concentration of power, danger, and eminent domain. My brain was delighted. Thank you!



                            Compare to this example from the analogy link:




                            Night Clouds (By Amy Lowell)

                            The white mares of the moon rush along the sky

                            Beating their golden hoofs upon the glass Heavens.




                            Which is pretty but makes your head hurt if you try to think about it too literally.






                            share|improve this answer















                            It's an "Analogy"



                            Similes and metaphors are types of analogy. It's still a metaphor because of the sentence structure (it's not a simile).



                            When the comparison is really extreme it's called an analogy. The brain has to "reach out" to synaptic connections find the cross-reference how these things are alike, and eventually offers up shapes and colors, like your fire-crown.



                            You have an instinct that is telling you these words are associated.



                            It's a good instinct. Keep listening!



                            It is not "empty", it is loaded with vivid imagery, but also other (surreptitious?) cross-referenced associations like concentration of power, danger, and eminent domain. My brain was delighted. Thank you!



                            Compare to this example from the analogy link:




                            Night Clouds (By Amy Lowell)

                            The white mares of the moon rush along the sky

                            Beating their golden hoofs upon the glass Heavens.




                            Which is pretty but makes your head hurt if you try to think about it too literally.







                            share|improve this answer














                            share|improve this answer



                            share|improve this answer








                            edited 17 mins ago

























                            answered 35 mins ago









                            wetcircuitwetcircuit

                            11.2k22255




                            11.2k22255






























                                draft saved

                                draft discarded




















































                                Thanks for contributing an answer to Writing Stack Exchange!


                                • Please be sure to answer the question. Provide details and share your research!

                                But avoid



                                • Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers.

                                • Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience.


                                To learn more, see our tips on writing great answers.




                                draft saved


                                draft discarded














                                StackExchange.ready(
                                function () {
                                StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fwriting.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f42684%2fis-using-an-empty-metaphor-considered-bad-style%23new-answer', 'question_page');
                                }
                                );

                                Post as a guest















                                Required, but never shown





















































                                Required, but never shown














                                Required, but never shown












                                Required, but never shown







                                Required, but never shown

































                                Required, but never shown














                                Required, but never shown












                                Required, but never shown







                                Required, but never shown







                                Popular posts from this blog

                                How to label and detect the document text images

                                Vallis Paradisi

                                Tabula Rosettana